Page 4 of Toxic

My stomach flips. I want to yell at her to get off him. I want to scream at him to push her aside.

But he doesn't.

She grabs his crotch and slurs something about a blowjob.

Gianni grunts. "Your turn, bro." He nods to the side room, and I suddenly feel sick.

Don't do it. Don't go,I silently plead.

There's a brief moment of hesitation, and I think Dante isn't going to go. My hope explodes all around me, but then my heart does.

Gianni steps forward so Lisa's squished between him and his brother. He tugs Lisa's hair back, causing her chest to press into Dante, and her mouth gasps in an O. He scans her face and says, "Be a good girl and make sure you swallow for him, all right?"

Her face flushes and she giggles. I want to die on the spot.

No, no, no! This can't be happening.

He won't do it. He won't after he just confessed he likes me and wants to take me out.

Gianni pats her ass and points toward the door. "You got ten minutes. Then Cara and I get the room."

Dante's shoulders flex, and he hesitates again.

Gianni releases Lisa and asks, "What's wrong? Why aren't you going?"

Dante glances at Lisa. "Don't waste my time if you're going to spit all over me."

She giggles again and tugs on his hand, leading him to the other room.

I think I might die. I want to crawl in a hole and never come out. When they come back into the room after ten minutes, Dante ignores me.

Still, I hold on to hope that he'll still call me. It makes me hate myself even more. Every night, I wait for his text messages like an idiot. Not once does he ever message me.

Then I get a boyfriend.

The first time I bring him to a party at his parents', Dante is suddenly on top of me like a fly in honey, ignoring his girlfriend, who gets pissed along with my boyfriend. That night he texts me.

Dante:What are you doing with that loser?

Me:What are you talking about? He's not a loser.

Dante:You can do a lot better.

Me:Not really your business.

Dante:Why did you stop coming to my fights?

My chest tightens.

Me:Why did you let Lisa suck you off after telling me you wanted to take me out?

Dante:I'm a dude. We do stupid shit. Are you going to hold it against me forever?

My heart races faster.

Dante:If it makes you feel better, I was only hard because I couldn't stop thinking about you.

I take several large breaths, not knowing how to respond and reprimanding myself that his statement gives me a twinge of happiness.

---