Page 86 of Wild Cub

Chapter 26

Ican’tbreathe.Ican’t find the air in my lungs to bring me back to life. My world stops. Everything freezes: no movement, no voices to pull me back from the edge. The well of emotions bursts. I beg and plead to God that those words aren’t true.

Alexander gathers me in his arms and says something, but all I hear are mumbles. He’d picked up my phone and must have been talking with Aggie. I feel dead inside, numb, no feelings. I can’t move my body. Alexander rushes me to the car, straps me in, and we take off with no regard for the speed limit. My mind is racing a million thoughts, and everything feels like fire, spreading and destroying everything in its path. I haven’t cried yet but it’s only a matter of time. I hear mumbles, a voice trying to pull me out of this daze and numbness.

“Teresa, say something,” Alexander says, reaching over to rub my cheek, stroking my hair. I look at him, trying to create a coherent sentence. “Come on, darlin’. I know you’re scared. We’re going to figure out what’s going on.”

His words echo.I know you’re scared. Iamscared. I’m scared the truth is what I am imagining, the worst thoughts reality.

Alexander parks the car and gets out. I don’t move. I don’t speak. Cape Breton doesn’t sing. He appears by the door and taps on the window. I look at him.Please don’t make me go back in there.First it was Jeremiah, now Lucie Lynn. Someone took her chance for happiness and more memories. Someone stole her from my life.

He opens my door, the creaking grabbing my attention. He pulls me into his chest, wrapping me in his arms. I feel my walls breaking down, collapsing under the weight. He takes my hand and guides me out of the truck, towards the entrance. The steps feel heavy, as if gravity has doubled down.

The sliding doors of the hospital open, a gust of air welcoming familiar senses. The information center is in front of me. One step at a time, the saying goes. What if I don’t want to walk? Will reality slip away?

“I’m.. I’m looking for the..” I stumble, emotions riding high. “the morgue.” I hear the clicking of keys, the person behind the desk staring at me.

“Name?”

“Tessa Bjorn.”

More clicking. “Ma’am, just follow the directions,” she said, pointing to the map on the desk, noting the first floor layout, down a flight of stairs to the lower level.

I nod my head, looking at Alexander. We head towards the stairs, each step echoing the words “it’s her.” I want to run. I want to erase time.

I find Aggie, bare face, wet streaks down her face. Jeremiah’s twisting his hat in his hands behind her. She moves for me to walk past her, a man at the entrance waiting. I look at Aggie, and she can’t look me in the eyes. Guilt rams through me like a train.

“Ms. Bjorn. Thank you for coming.” The man’s eyes narrow, still waiting for me to take responsibility. “Please come with me.” I look at Alexander. I can’t do this by myself. I reach back for him, wanting his gentle touch. I don’t know how much longer I can pretend I have everything intact.

I walk past the man as we move down the hallway. The doors swing open to the next and hopefully last room.

“You’re the emergency contact for Ms. Rivera.” We stop at a closed window. “I’m going to go in and open the window; we just need you to verify her identity. The police have already taken photos. If you need anything else, please do not hesitate to ask.” I just nod. My body vibrates with nerves.

The clanking of the curtain opening hits my ears, opening into a cold, metal room. He moves towards a table with a figure under the sheet. He slowly grabs the sheet and pulls it back. The curls. The curls are the first thing I see. Her curls sprawled out across the top of the table. The sheet uncovers her face, her button nose and full lips. I don’t see her eyes. Her eyes are closed. The harsh, cruel truth of it hits. This is Lucie Lynn, cold and gone. All sunshine and warmth is gone from her smile. Innocence taken away too soon. My knees buckle and Alexander catches me.

I ignore all rules and burst through the doors. She’s just laying on the table. Lifeless. I comb my fingers through her hair. My sweet friend. My fighter. My beautiful girl. Tears sting my eyes. Tears, warm and wet. Reality soon sets in. My body trembles, shaking with the truth that I’ll have to say goodbye. I have to let her go. My chest is heavy with emotions that I can’t release here. I search for her hand, grasping it in mine. Her body is cold, soulless.

“Teresa,” Alexander whispers.

“I don’t want to let her go.” My voice is shaky.

“I know, Little Cub.” He places his hands on my shoulders, trying to bring me to him. “We have to go.” I look at him, mascara running down my face. He wipes away one of the fallen tears with his thumb. “I’ll take you home.” I slightly nod.

I make my way back to the hallway, Jeremiah consoling Aggie. Aggie’s dark eyes flick to me, reaching out to embrace me. I hug her tightly, like I never want to let go.

“How did Aggie…” I say silently, as if the words refuse to come out, couldn’t say the rest of it.

“She said she’d been calling you, saying someone had been following her. She tried to shake them when she called me, but I heard her scream.” She pauses and shudders.. “I told Jeremiah to call 9-1-1. They traced her phone, but when they got there, it was too late.” She places her hands on my shoulders.

Someone set out to kill her.

I nod, looking at Alexander for strength. We leave the hospital; there’s nothing I can do.

My jaw drops as we reach the parking lot – it’s crowded with motorcycles. I look at Alexander with a puzzled look.

“We protect our own,” he whispers in my ear. They’d come because of me: Johnny with Topaz on the back, Seth and the kids in his truck, Matthew and Michelle gazing into the crowd, Rawlings leaning against his bike.

I wrap my arms around me as Rawlings approaches, his eyes boring into mine. “We express our condolences, Tessa. We know she meant so much to you.” He rubs my arm, expressing his sincere apologies. I look past him and find Doc, his saddened eyes and body slumped over his bike. I see Greer, sniffling as he looks at the pavement. It doesn’t take much to know that he’d established a friendship with Lucie.

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