Page 40 of Mistletoe Bargain with the Billionaire

She growls and I’d think it was cute if the whole situation wasn’t so fucked up. “Must be nice to be able to throw money at problems and make them go away,” she grumbles.

Excuse me? “It has its uses,” I reply, sharply.

“Do you really believe she won’t let it slip? Janey will tell someone and then…”

There’s a chance it’ll get back to Grams which means I need to come clean. If I could say that Carol and I are actually a couple now, I wouldn’t mind. But at the moment, I don’t know what the hell we are.

“Sorry, I didn’t pack my attorney or an NDA with me. Didn’t realize evidence of our bargain would be presented to your nemesis on a silver platter.” She looks chagrined at last. For some reason, it only stokes my anger further. “At best, we can hope no one believes her. She is known for her spiteful behavior after all.”

“Then, why give her money?” she asks, softly.

“To get your journal safely back.”

And because I couldn’t stand for her to humiliate you again tonight. If our roles were reversed, would she have done the same?

“Why were you carrying the damn thing with you anyway after we talked about it? You left it lying on the table at the wedding reception, too. Lydia or anyone else might’ve seen it.”

She throws her hands up, helplessly. “I don’t know! It’s become a habit to carry it. I’ve also been working on a new song so-”

“Another song someone else can steal from you after you carelessly leave it lying around?” She pales and I know I should shut up. I don’t. “Do you ever think things through, Carol? Or is everything flying by the seat of your pants with you?”

Her eyes narrow and I know I’ve hit a nerve. “Maybe I should think things through more often,” she says, slowly. “But maybe if I wasn’t the sort of woman who flies by the seat of her pants sometimes, I wouldn’t have agreed to this deal in the first place.”

Our deal. The bargain. No, she probably wouldn’t have agreed if she wasn’t a risk-taker. Or, she would’ve been much more mercenary about it. And, I never would’ve been on the verge of offering a woman like that my heart.

“Guess it’s wound up working to both of our advantages that you are then even if our original terms altered some.”

The instant it comes out of my mouth, it feels like the wrong thing to say, like I’m including our sexual relationship in this. Either way, I can tell she’s wounded by my words. I regret them but my pride is wounded, too. I don’t know what to do.

“Look, I’ll talk to Grams before her party tomorrow so… maybe it’s best if we call this bargain of ours off.”

“You don’t want me to go to your grandmother’s house for Christmas Eve as we agreed?” she asks. She looks hurt but maybe she’s just worried about losing part of the money I paid her.

I do want her to go with me. But not as my fake girlfriend. I don’t want another second of pretending Carol’s mine if she’s not. “I’m tired of the ruse, Carol. Keep the money I gave you but-”

“Right, we can go our separate ways. It was all fake anyway,” she says, stiffly.

The words I was going to say next die on my tongue.‘It was all fake anyway.’ That’s how she feels, is it? About all of it?

Drawing on every ounce of my acting ability, I give her a curt nod. “That’s right. It was.” So, why do I feel like I’m dying inside?

Snowflakes swirl around us and, in the distance, I can hear that damn Newlywed Bell ringing in the town square. But we’re not newlyweds. This feels like the death knell of whatever might’ve been.

“I can get another room or stay with Grams-”

“No, I’ll go to my parents’ house,” she says, her eyes no longer meeting mine. “I’ll go by the suite to get Mr. Jinglebell and we’ll be out of your way.” The shaky note in her voice is telling me something but it’s something my dumb heart isn’t ready to hear when it’s hurting this badly.

“That’s fine. Take the ugly Christmas sweaters with you, too. I won’t want it tomorrow night.”

Her chin trembles. I’m an asshole for uttering that worthless jibe but I can’t take it back now. She hurries away before I even have the chance, no doubt to find her parents since she won’t want to ride with me anymore.

How will she get back out west if we don’t travel together?

Not your problem now.

Our fake relationship is over.

And, I’m left with a very real broken heart.

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