Page 28 of Love, Untangled

“You mentioned anger twice.”

“Because I’m seriously pissed that I’m attracted to her.”

“Carlo, did you really think you’d go the rest of your life without feeling attraction?”

He glared at Sue. “Yes.”

“And you think that’s realistic? You’re thirty-one years old. Still so young. Many would call you a man in your prime. It would be odder, I’d think, if you didn’t feel a level of attraction to someone.”

“But it’s only been two years.”

“And there’s a time limit to grief?” Sue raised her eyebrows.

He shook his head. “Shouldn’t there be?”

“Why?”

“Because…”

Sue chuckled.

“I made vows. I plan to keep them.” Carlo glared at her, unsure why she couldn’t understand his point of view.

She slid off her glasses and tapped them on her tablet. “You know what I think?”

He grimaced. “No, but you’re going to tell me.”

“I am. I think you’re angry because you’re afraid.”

Carlo opened his mouth, ready to rebut her statement, but then slammed it shut. “Afraid of?”

“Why don’t you tell me?”

He snorted. This was why he’d refused to come to therapy since moving to Cinnamon Bay. Feeling was such a pain in the ass. He had to do all the work. He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck.

“I’m afraid of loving again. Just like I’m afraid of going to another fire and not being able to save the victims. That’s why I’ve avoided Marvin’s attempts to hang out—avoided getting to know any of the guys at Blazers.”

“Blazers…Cinnamon Bay’s fire department?” At his nod, she settled back in her chair. “There you go. I knew you were more attuned to your emotions than you let on.”

Carlo ignored the faint praise. “And that sucks.”

“It does,” Sue said, sympathy softening her features. “It really does. But it’s also the only way to live again.”

He glanced around Sue’s office, noting the elegant touches in the handblown vase and the photographs of the old lighthouse at various times of day along the back wall. She had seashells in a large crystal bowl on the hutch, and books lined the sturdy oak bookshelves behind her desk. He noted her long fingers and how she gripped her pen, but none of those observations allowed him to settle himself or his gaze. “Maybe I don’t want to.”

“Carlo,” Sue chided. “If Cora were here, with me, and you were gone—”

“I’d want her to move on, to live.” He rose, agitated. “But that doesn’t mean I’m ready.”

“You don’t have to be. No one’s making you do anything now.”

“The biggest problem is that Penelope is so young.”

Sue settled back, her expression intrigued. He shouldn’t have brought up his neighbor—not again. Sue would think there was more going on between them than there was.

“Oh?”

“She’s twenty.”

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