Page 91 of Still Here Without You

When the session’s done and my brain is overloaded with more information than I can handle, I find myself wandering around campus, not really sure where I want to be.

For twenty minutes, I walk around aimlessly until I come face to face with something I definitely didn’t want to see. Joel’s standing with a group of gorgeous girls over by the parking lot, his arm loosely draped over one of their shoulders as he talks animatedly about something. His stance is completely innocent, like they could just be friends, but the idea that something may happen between them is difficult to accept. My face scrunches as a shiver takes over me. Unable to watch, I turn on my heel and walk back the way I came. I’ve just passed the next building when someone calls out my name.

“Delilah, wait?”

Huh?Without stopping, I look over my shoulder to find the owner of the voice. A beautiful blonde jogs toward me with a sympathetic smile on her face. As she gets closer, I recognize her as Dylan’s girlfriend, Summer. The girl I met at the game. At least, I heard they were together now. Coming to a stop, I wrap my arms around myself and pull my lips into a half smile.

She sighs when she reaches my side. “Hi, thank you for stopping.”

“No problem. I…er…”

Summer laughs, and her accompanying smile offers so much warmth, it helps ease some of my nerves for why she’s here.

“I’m sorry. This is random, I know. I just…I wanted to say that Joel’s a jackass. An amazing, wonderful, freakishly intuitive, and smartjackass.”

I can’t help but laugh at her pretty accurate description.

“Thing is…we all know he has this ability to read a situation and act accordingly, to help put those around him at ease, to…you get it.” I nod as she continues. “But when it comes to his own life, he sees everything differently. What you saw back there. That was jackass Joel, flirting with some girls because he’s punishing himself for ruining his chance with the one andonlygirl he’s ever wanted. I’m not making excuses for his behavior, because I don’t even understand it, but I know that whatever he does, it doesn’t change his feelings for you. I think on some subconscious level he’s trying to hurt you both. Himself, for what he did, and you for your part in it.” I wince because I know she’s right. “Look, it’s not his smartest idea, but it’s how he’s been coping for the past year or more. I don’t know your side of the story, but I wanted you to know that.”

I stare at her in shock, unsure how to respond.

Summer crinkles her nose. “I’m sorry. I—”

“Thank you,” I interrupt, finally finding my voice. “You know, you sound a lot like him. Maybe you share his gift?” I say, trying to avoid directly discussing what she said.

She shakes her head. “Trust me, I don’t. But I’ve come to know him pretty well over the last nine months, and Dylan and I have spoken about it a lot. We can both see that he’s self-destructing. He just can’t see it himself.”

“He’s lucky to have you both as friends.”Avoidance is key.

“You’re not wrong there,” she jokes. “But there’s only so much we can do.” She scrunches up her nose again and frowns. “I’m so sorry. I’m not usually the meddling type. Maybe you’re right and Joel is rubbing off on me a little.Dammit.” She laughs, and I join in. “Do you want to maybe get a coffee and not talk about the jackass?”

I’m taken aback by her question, but there’s something about her that makes me want to say yes, even though I shouldn’t. She’s Joel’s friend, Dylan’s girlfriend, and seems to know a lot about me. This can’t end well, and yet, I could use some girl time with someone who’s not on the cheer squad. One coffee can’t hurt too much.I hope.

“He did not say that?” I question in disbelief. Summer and I have been talking for an hour and it’s really taken my mind off things.

“He did,” she says, nodding her head.

“Oh, my God.” I laugh more than I’ve laughed in a while as I cover my face. “I need to meet him.”

“His parents recently moved back here, so he’s started visiting more often to see them.”

I smile, shaking my head again as we talk about Summer’s friend Logan. He sounds like a character, that’s for sure. To Summer’s credit, not once has she mentioned Joel since we got here, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed our chat. It’s nice to talk about things other than cheer. If I wasn’t trying to distance myself from all things Joel, I would definitely try to make this a regular thing.

I’m about to ask more about Logan when Dylan walks into the café. He sees Summer, and his eyes light up. My heart clenches. It’s obvious that he’s completely in love with her. “Your man has arrived,” I say with a smile, gesturing behind her.

Summer looks over her shoulder before shaking her head. “Ugh. I love him, but I’m going to kill him. I thought we’d have some privacy since we’re not on campus.”

I try to hide my smirk, but it breaks through. Summer huffs out a laugh and shuffles over in her seat, ready for Dylan to join us.And that’s my cue to leave.

“Fancy meeting you here,” he says to Summer as he sits down. “Hi, Delilah.”

“Hi, Dylan,” I say with a wave.A wave. I haven’t spoken a word to him since before I left, and I wave. He laughs before his eyes bounce between the two of us. “I didn’t know you were friends.”

“It’s new,” Summer says, sounding bored, but I can see the way she’s trying to communicate something to him with her eyes. My guess is he wasn’t supposed to show up here.

Dylan’s brows pull in together, and he frowns. “Does Joel know?”

“Let’s talk about it later; what are you doing here?” Summer asks.

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