Page 46 of Still Here Without You

We pull up at my dorm, and it takes me a second to let go. Joel doesn’t move either, sharing my need to prolong all our moments. When I finally hop off, he links our fingers and pulls my hand to his cheek. “I’m more than happy to come in and help you pack, or even just watch if you’re one of those chicks that doesn’t like people touching your things.”

I nudge his face with the hand that he’s holding close to him. “First, chick? Really? And second, I am one of those chicks, but I’m almost done, anyway. I’m just going to pack the last of my clothes and say goodbye—well, see you later—to the few people left on the squad that don’t hate me.” It’s definitely easier to bid farewell to those that I’m not as close to.

“I can come with you. Stand in solidarity. An intimidating force to stop them from saying anything that might pop into their heads.”

I laugh at the seriousness of his expression, even though I know he means every word. “As much as I appreciate that, I’ll be fine. Thank you for the ride.”

“Anytime, Princess.” Joel winks as he kisses my hand. “I’ll be back to collect you in a few hours. Consider me your slave for the day.”

“Careful, I might hold you to that one.” I grin.

“I’ll be praying you do.”

I’m still shaking my head when he speeds away, and I know I need to move inside, but I can’t bring myself to take a step until the last glimpse of Joel is gone. Who knew falling in love would suck so bad.

After saying my goodbyes to the squad and coaching staff, Rachel and I walk arm in arm through the campus, slowly making our way back to the dorms. “So, you’re really not going to lock him down?”

“I’m really not. I take it you think he’s a catch?”

“I don’t really know him well enough to say, but the way he looks at you… Aaah, I want that.”

I stop and turn to look at her. “Do you? I thought you wanted to hook up with the entire football team.”

“Oh, yes, that’s my number one priority. Number two is what you and Joel have.”

I laugh. “Technically, we don’t have anything.”

Rachel scoffs. “Keep telling yourself that.”

“I plan to,” I mumble.

Rachel’s still laughing as my dorm comes into view but stops when we reach the doors. “Delly, I’m going to miss you. Promise me we’ll talk every day.”

“I’m definitely not making that promise.” I laugh and she sags.

“Ugh! You’re right. Okay, as long as I’m the first person you call with any big news.”

My lips pull into a grin. “That, I can do.”

When Joel arrives, I’m a mess on the floor of my dorm room. Even though I never actually said the word goodbye to Rachel, we both knew that was it for a while. I’m completely spent of all my emotional energy, and the thought of having to do that with Joel has me curled up in a ball, wishing the day away, while at the same time hoping it never ends.

“I know you’re in there, Del; open up,” Joel yells, banging on the door. I drag myself up off the floor and pull myself together, plastering a smile on my face.

“Sorry, I was in the bathroom,” I say as I open up.

Joel presses a kiss to my hair as he quietly chuckles. “Del, you don’t have a bathroom in your room.”

“I know. But can you pretend that I do? And that’s why I didn’t answer?”

He wipes his thumb under my eyes, most likely cleaning up the mascara I’m sure has run there. “We can pretend whatever you want. In fact, for today, let’s pretend that we have forever.”

My lips pull up into a grin, and I nod. “If we’ve got forever, how about we take the long way to your house. Cruise around for a bit.”

Joel’s face lights up. “And that right there is why I love you. Come on.”

He waits for me to grab my bag and phone, and then with his arm around my shoulders, pulls the door shut and leads the way.

We ride around for the better part of an hour, and it’s heaven. With my arms wrapped around Joel’s waist and my head pressed into his back, I enjoy the feeling of reckless abandon. Leaving my life in someone else’s hands, handing over control of the reins, and just…being. When we hit an open road, Joel increases the speed, and suddenly I’m flying. Sitting up straight, I let my head fall back and scream out into the wind, feeling Joel’s body shake as he chuckles. I don’t have time to be embarrassed before he’s yelling out along with me. We’re like two crazy kids, screaming into the silence, not a care in the world. Except that’s not us. We both have so much on our minds. So much to care about.

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