Page 52 of Begin Again Again

“He said he’d be here by nine.”

“Ahh, starting a night out at nine o’clock…” Lara sighed. “Nathan’s already asleep on the couch and Angus won’t know I’m gone—maybe I should sneak out and come with you?”

Beth smiled. She never knew what to say when Lara said stuff like this.

Lara straddled the flat rim of the bath and sat down. “Did you look at any of those jobs I sent you?”

Beth placed her lip gloss back in her make up bag, avoiding Lara’s gaze. “It’s on tomorrows’ list, I promise.”

“Are you going to do applications after you get home from sleeping with a twenty-five-year-old?”

“Yes?”

Lara laughed. “Whatever you say. Just don’t wait too long, some of the applications close on Monday. After that there won’t be any more jobs coming up until after Christmas, and your contract’s up at the end of Jan, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. I’ll get on them, right away.” Beth attempted a grateful smile. The mirror showed a woman with mild to severe period cramps.

“I know community engagement isn’t thrilling,” Lara said. “But they should let you work from home at least two days a week, and the pay’s good.”

Beth tried smiling wider, opening up her eyes. “Great.”

“So… think you’ll see Derek Hardiman tonight?”

Beth sincerely hoped not, but considering the state of her luck right now, he’d probably walk in on her and Byron doing it. “If I do, should I tell him you said hi?”

Lara’s expression was dreamy. “I can’t believe you know him. Or Byron does. Like, he’s a real human being who lives in a house.”

“Shits in it too, probably.”

Lara swatted her. “Okay then, yes.”

“Yes?”

“Tell Derek Hardiman I said hi. And find out if he likes MILFs.”

Beth snorted. “Yeah, I’ll get onto that. Slide it right into a casual conversation.”

Her phone buzzed and she snatched it up.

I’m outside, Horoscopes. Want me to come in and say hi?

Beth pictured introducing Byron to her friends slash landlords— Lara mining information about Derek Hardiman, a person he never seemed keen to discuss. Nathan blinking owlishly, irritated to have been woken up… Plus, Lara might go all big brother on him and tell him not to fuck her around—a message she’d already delivered in Princes Park, in a far less cartoonish manner.

So, all things considered, no. She did not want him to come in and say hi.

Lara laughed. “Let me guess? It’s the twenty-first century version of a horn honk? Come out so I don’t have to meet your dad?”

Beth smiled weakly. It would be so easy to say ‘Yeah, he doesn’t want to come in.’ A year ago, she would have done it, just lied and ducked out the door. And she’d have told herself she was sparing Lara’s feelings but really, she’d be throwing Byron under the bus to save herself. She cleared her throat. “Nah, he’s being a gentleman, but I’m just going to duck out.”

Lara froze mid-sip. “What? Why? I want to meet him!”

“It’s a bit soon for introductions. Next time, maybe?”

Beth wished she wasn’t standing in front of a mirror. If she wasn’t, she wouldn’t have seen Lara’s blank irritation and her wince of fear. She packed the rest of her make up into her bag, tussling with the urge to acknowledge the awkwardness and apologise. It wouldn’t make anything better. There shouldn’t have been anythingtomake better.

Lara drank her wine, her face turned to the wall. Beth was sure if she lined up a split screen between her friend and her mother the night of the senior formal, they’d be mirror images.

You’re not responsible for other people’s feelings, she reminded herself.It is not your job to tell people what they want to hear.

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