Page 147 of Begin Again Again

Byron took his phone back. “Yeah, thanks. I didn’t show you so you could take the piss. What do you think?”

“I think I was right about her not actually dumping you.”

“That’s all?”

Derek settled back against the couch. “Do you see it going anywhere?”

“Yeah, definitely. But I guess…”

“Not in Perth?”

“Nah, I guess not in Perth.”

“But why not? If you can see it going somewhere, you should follow it through.”

“I can’t leave work.”

“Cool. Well, you’re being a coward.”

His words slapped like a belly into water. “What do you—”

Derek held up his hands. “Fucking relax. Hear me out.”

Byron’s jaw clenched. “Fine.”

“You didn’t want to be an electrician,” Derek said. “It’s what you started doing once you got—once you knew you couldn’t play anymore.”

He glowered into his port. “Right.”

“And maybe you’re a great sparky, I don’t fucking know. But if you ask me, you don’t really give a shit about it. So, what’s your plan here? Work with your dad until he retires, and you take over?”

Byron’s gut twisted. “I dunno. Maybe?”

“Well, say you do that. When your old man retires, is he gonna let you run things your way? Or will he keep giving you shit, acting like you owe him a massive favour and he’s still your boss?”

Byron could just see his dad dropping into site meetings, talking over him in front of the foreman, making him look like an idiot. “So what? I just fuck him over?”

“I dunno, that’s your call. But he doesn’t own you. And acting like he does is doing you zero favours.”

“You sound like Sal.”

“Maybe Sal has a point. Sometimes you have to disappoint people. That’s life.”

“And I’m a coward because I can’t?”

Derek drank his port. “You’re not getting a single swing out of me, BT. Not one.”

“Sorry,” Byron said, feeling like an idiot.

“It’s fine.”

They sat in silence for a while, the shadows on the wall sliding higher. They’d have to turn the light on soon or they’d be sitting in the dark. Byron thought of Beth. She’d never be stuck here sitting in the dark. She was willing to move, to change, have hard conversations and do hard work. She wanted the best and she’d wanted him. But that was just for now. What if he was stuck where he was forever, the way he’d been since his leg got fucked up? She’d leave him worse than she’d found him, and he’d have to come crawling home again…

“Bloke?”

Byron looked up. “Yeah?”

“When I said you’re a coward, what makes you think I’m not the same way?”

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