Page 83 of Degrees of Control

“Then I’ll leave the both of you to it.” Sophia stepped forward and kissed Charlie on the cheek. “Text me and let me know how everything goes.”

How the hell had James gotten her to agree to this? Sophia didn’t know the details of their break-up but she wasn’t an idiot, and Charlie couldn’t imagine her helping him unless James came to her on his knees with a homemade apple pie and a‘you’re better than me’badge. Would he have done that just to go on a weird picnic with her?

James led her out into the driveway and toward a dusty-looking pickup.

“What happened to your transformer?” Charlie asked, looking about for the huge black truck.

“Sold it.” James opened the passenger door and held it open for her. “This is my sister’s old Ford, it’s a piece of shit but it runs fine.”

Charlie would have to take his word for it. She knew exactly nothing about cars, although she could admit this one was easier to get into. After a short drive, they reached the Lake of Isles. The day was gray and cold and barely anyone was around. Charlie hoped she wouldn’t have to eat a prepared lunch. As nice a gesture as that would be, she was so nervous she was sure nothing would go down. Thankfully they made their way toward the water with nothing but themselves and James quickly directed her onto a weather-beaten park bench. They sat down and stared out at the lake.

“Pretty,” Charlie offered and got a curt nod in response.

She could feel him working up to what he needed to say, but as the minutes passed in silence, she wondered if she’d have to step up and ask him herself, when he finally spoke. “Not long till you’re headed home, huh?”

Charlie ran her shoe across the dirt at their feet. “Yeah, I’ve booked my flight for twelve days after the wedding. I’ve got a casual job lined up and one of my friends asked me to help with a six-week program for teenagers. It’d be pro bono, but its good experience.”

“That’s great.” James seemed to physically push forth his next question. “Where will you be staying? Once you’re back in Australia?”

“My parents’ place for a few days until I get settled but I’ve already signed a lease with my friend Ky.”

The skin between James’ eyebrows contracted.

“She’s a woman.”

James’ face unscrunched as he stared out at the water. “I suppose rushing to the airport to stop you wouldn’t be appropriate?”

Charlie smiled, but it hurt. “As romantic as that might be, it’s time for me to go home.”

He nodded. “I know what we had wasn’t romantic. When I wasn’t being a dick, I was fucking the shit out of you.”

“Hey, who says that isn’t romance?” She covered his thick-knuckled hand with hers. “I fell pretty damn hard for you, James Hunter. Something must have worked.”

James took a deep breath and looked back toward the lake. “I-I have something I’ve been meaning to tell you. Iwantedto tell you the night you left, but you don’t know how fucking hard it is to say out loud…”

Charlie put a hand on his arm. He was only wearing a heavy gray T-shirt and Charlie wondered if he was shaking from cold or nerves. “You don’t have to tell me anything.”

“Iwantto tell you. Is that okay?”

She nodded, trying to drive all the emotional support she could through her palm and into his body.

James drew in another big breath, his entire body vibrating with nervous energy. “So, when I was fourteen, my brother Will was seeing this girl, Meghan. She was a dancer and she’d been in a couple of music videos, anyway the point is I had a crush on her.”

James’ voice was flat, but Charlie noticed a quake at the end of his vowels. She sat as still as possible, as though if she moved, even breathed too loudly, she’d spook him.

“She used to flirt with me, telling me how big I was getting, how I was gonna be hotter than my brother, just stupid shit. I was a dumb kid so I ate it up. Around that time my parents were separating and one weekend both of them were away, so my brother threw a party.”

Charlie felt ice water trickle its way into her veins, but forced herself to remain immobile.

“Almost four hundred people showed up, mess and noise like you wouldn’t believe. So, like I said, I was fourteen and Kelsey made me go to bed pretty early because she was takin’ me to the dentist in the morning. I had braces, I ever tell you that?”

“No.”

James swallowed so hard Charlie could hear the saliva working its way down his throat.

“I woke up in the middle of the night an’—an’ Meghan was on top of me. She was naked and I, uh—tried to ask her what she was doing but she didn’t answer and she just started, uh, kissin’ me.”

Charlie clapped her hands over her mouth.

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