Page 37 of The Virgin and the Viscount

“Then it is settled. We’ll leave tomorrow. Have a proper beginning to this marriage.”

She nodded. The happiness coursing through her made her nervous. Hesitant.

“Now we’ll have no more talk about annulments,” he said. “You are my wife in every way.”

Her brow grew heavy with a frown.

“It’s wasn’t a trick, Freckles. I had always planned to consummate. I wanted you, remember. Still do.”

Let it go, she silently told herself. Let this be enough. He desired you. He still desires you. That is enough.

But despite her inner lecture, she couldn’t let it go. Before she could think better of it, she asked, “And what of your earlier promise to let me live separately? If I still despise you in six months’ time?”

She tried to keep her tone light so he wouldn’t guess she wanted him to denounce his earlier promise. How desperately she wanted him to pull her back astride him, kiss her, and declare he couldn’t fulfill his promise. That he could never let her go.

Despite her attempts to keep her tone light, she must’ve failed, because she felt him still beside her. Felt the deep breath he drew in, held, and then slowly released.

He was no doubt thinking of what to say. Of how to extract himself from her desperate clinging.

Finally, he said softly, “Don’t worry, Freckles. I’ll keep my word. In six months, we’ll be free of each other. So if you find yourself still miserable as my wife, then we can live separately. Your reputation will be protected.”

Her heart squeezed and her nose began to sting. She would not cry. There was no reason to. He was simply stating the facts. What they’d done in this bed hadn’t truly changed things between them. Their marriage wasn’t a love match, and she’d do well to remember that. Physical pleasure was one thing, and Sullivan might desire her in his bed. But that didn’t mean he’d allow her into his heart. People usually didn’t. No one she loved, save her Papa, had ever loved her in return. And she’d seen what a one-sided love did to a marriage. Poor Thomas had once adored her sister, but Melanie’s coldness had ruined both of them. Tilly wouldn’t allow that to happen to her. She would let Sullivan have her body, but she’d keep her heart safely locked away.

Once Sullivan had fallen asleep, she crept from his bed and returned to her own smaller bedchamber. Letting him take her body would be one thing, but sleeping curled in his arms was far too intimate. She’d never be able to protect herself from hurt if she allowed that. So she’d sleep alone.

…

Sullivan awoke to an empty bed.

It was still dark out, so Tilly hadn’t roused because it was morning. He reached across the bed to find her spot cold. She’d been gone a while. He exhaled slowly and looked up at the dark ceiling. She’d been so responsive during their lovemaking, he’d thought it had been a turning point in their relationship. And he’d even relented, offering her an out in a few months if he couldn’t make her happy.

Obviously, he still had work to do. He’d take her to his seaside village. Getting her out of London would serve twofold. They’d have time for just the two of them, but she also would be out of the fray of her Ladies of Virtue duties. Perhaps it would be as simple as out of sight, out of mind. The slower movement of life in Southend-on-Sea should be a welcome change to the excitement London provided. Maybe she’d see that she didn’t need her little group the way she thought she did.

And in the midst of all of that, he’d seduce her again and again until she couldn’t walk away from him. He was done questioning his good fortune. God or the fates or whatever had seen fit to put her in his life, gave her to him as his wife, and he intended to keep her.

He knew how stubborn she was. Given her intractable nature, it was quite probable she still believed he was a selfish, lazy cad, interested only in his own pleasure.

She wasn’t wrong. When it came to her, he was selfish and a cad. However, she’d learn soon enough that he was not lazy and he was interested in more than his own pleasure. In fact, he found her pleasure quite fascinating.

Perhaps they had only a limited time together. It mattered not. However long they had, he would bed her over and over until she was so mindless with pleasure, she wouldn’t want to leave him. And, in the process, he would finally rid himself of this stupid obsession he had with her.

Then, when their time was up, he would be the one to walk away.

…

It took them less than a full day to get to his estate. It was a modest estate by some standards, but she found the three-story brownstone home beautiful. She still hadn’t managed to quite look her husband in the eye after their previous night together. Her cheeks heated with a blush every time she replayed the way he’d brought her body pleasure, the words he’d said, his intoxicating kisses.

Thankfully, once they’d arrived at what he foolishly referred to as “the cottage,” he’d claimed he had business to attend to with the housekeeper and he’d sent her off to rest from their travels. Now, after a short nap, Sullivan had come to retrieve her for her first walk on the Southend-by-the-Sea pier. She was ridiculously excited about seeing the ocean for the first time. Hearing the sounds and smelling the fresh salty air.

She’d dressed herself in her smartest new walking gown, a blue and white striped confection that fit her perfectly and even had a matching parasol. Of course Agnes had made a few adjustments to the umbrella so that it could serve a dual purpose and offer Tilly protection (in the form of a thin dagger) should she require it. Not something she would share with Sullivan, since he was still holding to his unreasonable demands that she not do her duties as a Lady of Virtue. She refused to quit, though, no matter what he said. She’d simply be more careful so he was none the wiser to her activities. It had never occurred to her to inform her mother of her training and special skills. Tilly was quite accustomed to hiding the truth of her group.

So now she and her husband, still a strange notion to consider, walked together, her gloved hand looped through his elbow to rest upon his forearm. As they walked, she could feel the play of the muscles in his arm. Oh the wicked things he’d done to her body the night before. Not to mention the way he’d slid his hand up her skirts in the carriage on the ride to his estate. Twice. She blushed at the memory of how she’d clung to his arm and cried out his name. What a wanton she was turning out to be.

The ocean sprawled in front of them, the water so blue in some places it appeared to be made of glass. She gasped and stopped walking as she took in the view. Never in her wildest imaginations would she have conjured this reality. So much water. It was endless. There was an entire world out there. Suddenly, she felt very small.

“What do you think?” he asked.

“It’s so breathtaking. I had no idea.”

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