Page 49 of The Scoundrel and the Lady

Merritt stood in Iris’s foyer, waiting to see if she would deign to see him, hating the way his stomach churned. This was how he had felt waiting to be admitted into the drawing room of Lydia’s country home. Nervous. Doubtful. Unworthy.

When Lydia had rejected his offer, he had sworn he would never again give a member of the gentry that much power over him. And he hadn’t—he’d managed to keep that promise to himself for nearly a decade.

Until Iris.

And, indeed, Iris had not put him in this position.

If anyone was in the wrong, it was he.

And yet, he could not help resenting her for not accepting his proposal the first time he’d issued it. She simply had to see reason on this matter.

When her butler came and led him to her parlor, announcing that she had agreed to see him, he had hopes that perhaps she had come around Until, that was, Merritt stepped into the room and saw the expression on her face. Her brow was knitted in a disagreeable frown. Her lips were pursed into a scowl, as though she had just bitten into something extremely unpleasant.

She stood, motionless, in front of the settee.

“I believe we discussed everything already,” Iris said.

He’d come to convince her to marry him. He would not beg, but he also didn’t want to see her ruined. She was a delightful creature when she wasn’t frowning at him. Or being stubborn. Or shortsighted. And he simply wouldn’t stand by while her reputation was dragged through the mud. “Perhaps, but I do wish you’d reconsider.”

“Is that all you wanted to say?” Anger flashed in her eyes and her skin pinkened.

He wanted to go to her and pull her into his arms, but he didn’t dare. Physical affection would not persuade her, he knew that now. “No, I wanted to let you know that I’ve responded to the blackmailer, and I’ll be meeting him or her later this afternoon to pay the requested funds.”

She walked away from the seating area to stand by the fireplace. “I shall pay,” she said, her words cold. He’d done this to her. He’d selfishly wanted her and seduced her, believing he could salvage the situation. “That is not necessary.” He stepped closer to her. “I will pay.”

“This is my mess, my ruination.” She shifted to the window, turned her back on him, effectively retreating from him. “I should pay.”

“I won’t argue this with you. I will pay the monies and manage the blackmail situation. This entire issue is my doing. I should never have agreed to the wager and most assuredly not agreed to you posing as a gentleman.”

She turned to face him, her expression blazing. “You would not have been able to stop me. I had made up my mind.”

He exhaled. “Iris, it would be so much simpler if you would just agree to marry me. I would see to your every need.”

“But you would never love me.” Her chin elevated, and her eyes flashed. She embodied defiance in that moment, and he thought she’d never looked more beautiful. But he was not so foolish to tell her so.

Her green eyes met his, and he wanted to correct her, wanted to tell her that he hoped someday he’d be able to love her, but he didn’t dare. He could never make such a promise. He didn’t want to hurt her; she was far too precious for that. But he did not believe in the notion of romantic love. Passion and lust, yes, but romantic love was fleeting and therefore not real.

Those things were lies that men used to manipulate young ladies of gentle breeding. He had built a career out of exposing those lies for what they were. More than that, he’d built his own moral code on it. He would not lie now. Not even for Iris.

“Our union would be one of mutual respect and passion and camaraderie,” he said. “That should prove enough.”

Her lips pursed, and she shook her head.

“What shall you do if rumors spread?” he asked.

“It wouldn’t be a rumor, now would it? It is true, after all. It is what I deserve, Merritt. I sought you out in hopes of straightening out my brother, and all I did was end up behaving the wanton.” She laughed a humorless laugh. “No, I became a wanton. I am ruined. I am not too proud to admit that,” she said with a wry smile. “If there is a scandal, I shall weather it.”

“Very well, but it doesn’t change the situation.”

Her delicate shoulders lifted in a shrug. “It matters not. My brother is doing what he wishes in life, paying no mind to anything I say. And I certainly have no business giving anyone advice on propriety now.”

“If your reputation is tarnished, will it not affect your own future in Society? Any affiliations you might have?”

Her mouthed opened slightly, and her breath caught, as if she hadn’t even considered that until this very moment. “I’m not certain. I have funds saved. I don’t believe Jasper would turn me out onto the streets.” She straightened her shoulders. “I shall endure this, as I have everything else in life. I mean to stay in London only until Jasper is married, and then I shall travel.”

“I do not wish to end our alliance,” he said gently. “I do consider you a friend, Iris. And you’ve been truly kind to my sister.”

“Despite her brief foray into Society, I believe your sister shall be all right. She has grown so much.” Her smile changed from something forced to something wistful. “I suspect she shall make a great match.”

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