Page 338 of Ashes of Sin and Stardust

“Now why the fuck would I send you away?”

“Don’t fuck with me and give me hope like that!” I screamed into his chest.

He picked me up off his lap and set me on the couch. I collapsed on my side, sobbing dizzily into the pillows as he walked away from me. As soon as I could catch my breath, as soon as I could stand, I would leave. And I’d probably just drive until I ran out of gas, and then sit there in my car until I ran out of life, because I would never be happy again.

Before I managed to get up, he was back in front of me, holding the belt and the collar. Looking at the chastity belt was just reinforcement of the beautiful collar downstairs that I would probably never wear now.

Reuben pulled me to a standing position so I stood directly in front of where he sat, and wiped the tears from my face with his thumbs. I squeezed my eyes shut.

He spoke so softly, so quietly. “Who do you belong to?”

I snapped my mouth shut, shaking my head. “No.”

“Alice.” He kissed my temple, his voice still soft, but a little louder. “I’m not releasing you, baby. Now look at me and answer me, or you’re going to be in even more trouble.”

I reached up and rubbed at my eyes and swallowed, and then opened them and met his gaze.

“Who do you belong to?”

I could only whisper it. “I belong to Reuben Weston.”

“Is that going to change because you did something stupid?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah?”

“No.”

I bit my lip and tried to force myself to breathe.

“I don’t expect you to be perfect, little bug. I expect you to let me teach you, and let me lead you.” He buckled the belt around my hips, pulling the strap between my legs shut and locking it into place.

“I expect you to take corrections and learn from your mistakes.” He reached for the body collar, sliding the jewelry carefully into my skin, and kissing each spot as he finished.

“I expect you to always grow, always work to be the best you can be, and that means letting me protect you, even from yourself.” Reaching across to the end table by the couch, he opened a drawer and withdrew two carabiners. He clipped the cuffs on my wrists together behind my back, and then attached them to the belt, rendering my hands useless.

“You need tothinkbefore you do things like that. And, most importantly, when you want to work on something you’re afraid of, you need to ask me to help you work on it. I would have gladly put something around your neck to help you work through your fear, helped you get used to the feeling, if that was something you told me you wanted to work on. But you didn’t. You just... did it yourself.”

I was still sobbing and I felt shaky, but I was pretty sure he wasn’t going to bind me up just to break up with me, so that weight lifted off my chest.

“Why didn’t I do that? Why didn’t I find a belt or a ribbon or a play collar, and start teaching you to be comfortable with it? Hm? Why didn’t I do that?” He held my waist and kissed my belly, speaking softly, the words now as gentle as his kisses.

I pulled at my hands, wanting to wipe my face, but they were clipped behind me. I choked out another sob. “B-because, i-it’s my h-hard limit.”

“Mh-hm. And why the hell would I ever try to get you to change that limit to fit my unnecessary fantasies?”

“B-because... you w-want me t-to be better, and not be afraid,” I said, my voice coming easier now that I was breathing a little more.

“I want you to be not afraid, yes. But everyone has limits. Having limits doesn’t make you weak, or afraid. It’s healthy to know what you like, and what you don’t. What you want, and what you don’t want.”

“But I want it! I want it because it’s for me, and it’s special, and it’s so pretty and I want to not be afraid of it! And because it will make you happy and I want to wear it to make you happy!”

He looked up at me, his lips still pressed against my navel. He was all blurry because I was crying again. “Then we can work on that. But you must still have limits, Alice. Because if I find out you let me do something to you that hurt you, just because I said I wanted it, I will be very disappointed in you. Ourrelationshipis more important than ourkinks.”

He reached out to me, opening his arms for a hug, pressed my face into his neck and wrapped my arms around him, my heart overflowing with relief. He enclosed me in his tight embrace, whispering softly until I calmed down.

It ended too soon. He made me stand up and go back to the kitchen table. He sipped his coffee and ate his breakfast, and gave me sips of mine since my wrists were still bound. Then after breakfast, he took me downstairs to the dungeon.

I shivered in fear at what he would do. He unclipped the chastity belt, had me bend over at the waist, and he squirted a little bit of lube into my ass. Then he slid a small plug into my asshole.

---