Page 53 of Girl Violence

“Aren’t you going to yell at me or something?”

“Why?” He looks at her tiredly. “Why bother? What else is there to say that I haven’t already said?”

“I’m sorry…” she apologises, and he shakes his head.

“You need to grow up,” he says, so cutthroat, Josette’s heart sinks. “Your mum still loves you. Still asks about you every day. Couples break up all the time. It was just one of those things—”

Why is he bringing up her mother?

“Mum left us.”

“She leftme. And I’ve forgiven her,” he says, sorrow heavy in his eyes, enough to choke her. “Our relationship was always hard, even before we had you. I get why she left. I mean, we were together since we were young. We had you at eighteen, and at first, it was great. We were a little happy family, but then everything became too much. We never could get ahead. Life wasn’t being enjoyed. Neither of us were living.”

“And you’re living now? All you do is work.”

“I like my job,” he says softly, and she clenches her teeth hard, hating that they’re having this conversation. She just wants him to yell at her. Tell her what a disappointment she is as usual. Shout at her for being selfish. Reckless. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Anything but this. That Josette acts this way because of her mother.

“Your mum and I have been through a lot. We were strained. I don’t blame her for falling in love with someone else. Someone who can give her what she wants. She never wanted to leave you behind. You just wouldn’t go with her, and she didn’t want to force you. You should try and forgive her so that you can stop this rampage you’re on. I just want you to be happy again. I’ll try if you do?” he suggests. “You could start by trying to rebuild your relationship with her. See where it takes you?”

“No.”

He frowns. “Why?”

Because Josette hates her for leaving. For destroying their family and hurting her dad. He said they were strained, but he was blindsided. She didn’t have to go and meet Michael and date him on the sly. Josette’s living in a house that looks like a shrine of what they all used to be—a fake happy family. “Because I refuse tolie.”

Turning on her heel, she needs to get out of there. Her dad calls her but doesn’t pursue. She can’t listen anymore.

Heading outside, she slams the door behind her. She doesn’t want to talk about her mother or think about her. And she doesn’t want to rebuild anything with her.

She wants to forget.

Angry tears fall down her face. She wipes them away, furious at herself for crying and being pathetic. Before she knows it, she’s heading toward the park. It’s dark, and she doesn’t want to go there but doesn’t know where else to go. She needs to clear her mind.

She thought she had gotten over this, but clearly not. As soon as someone mentions her mother, she either turns into a wreck or goes numb. It broke Josette watching her pack her bag and walk out. When she begged her not to leave and she still did. Josette was scared. She didn’t know what life would be like without her. She’s never had tolivewithouther.

Miss Finn was right to call her mother a troublemaker. She almost ruined her life when she was Josette’s age. It was why she was so hard on Josette as a child, not wanting her to follow in her footsteps. Still, she was her mother, and Josette loved her. She still does. She asked Josette to go with her, but she said no and walked out anyway. It doesn’t matter that she calls, trying to get Josette to meet her new life. She still felt discarded when she left.

Instead of crying, she had fun, drank booze, and partied with Jenna. But then she lost her virginity, drank too much, and partied too hard. She got into trouble like her mother, but it was better than thinking about her.

Josette finally calms down and stops crying. And maybe because she’s so used to it by now, she’s no longer jolted by the sound of footsteps behind her. She knows it’s Vince before she even turns to face him, knowing he will be standing behind her, following her to ensure she’s okay.

She turns to face him finally. He frowns, watching her wipe the tears from her face. “Why are you crying?”

“I’m not,” she says, even though it’s stupid to deny it. “Why are you here?”

“Why are you?”

“I needed a walk.”

“Did he yell at you? I can go and talk—”

“No, he...he didn’t.” She turns away, biting her lip to stop more tears from spilling. Why is it they worsen when someone asks if you’re okay? It’s like her body is forcing her to admit she’s not.

Vince’s hand brushes against her shoulder, but she pulls away. “I’m fine, Vince.”

“Tell me.”

“But why?” Josette asks. It comes out like a demand. She’s losing it again. “It’s not like you care, really, is it? Nobody does. Nobody cares. We’re all selfish deep down. We only think of ourselves. It’s just life.” There’s silence between them for a few moments, and Josette eventually sighs, rubbing a hand over her face. “I’m sorry, just...just ignore me. I’m fine. You can go.”

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