Page 71 of Color of Love

Chapter 21

Blake’s instincts were all out of whack. When he’d woken up yesterday morning alone in Justine’s bed, something hadn’t felt right, and not just because she wasn’t there with him. The brief message he received from her hadn’t felt right and the two times he popped into her office to see her, she hadn’t been available. These were all completely innocent things individually, but when combined with his gut feeling, they made him suspicious.

Something had changed the other night, when he had kissed her, stripped her. When he had seen her orange panties something had stirred inside him, he didn’t know what it was, but it hovered there even now, just out of reach. Things between them had shifted, this wasn’t just a casual friends-with-benefits scenario anymore, that was for sure, but he didn’t know what it was.

The L-word circled his brain, but he dismissed it immediately. He didn’t love her, he didn’t love anyone. But he did care about her deeply, she was his closest friend. The way she was helping him made him truly believe for the first time that he could get better. He knew he’d never be cured, this would never go away completely, there was too much scar tissue for that. But he could manage it, because of her and her amazing skills. She had become so special to him and for the first time, he didn’t panic about what the rest of his life looked like, he was enjoying what it currently was far too much.

Until that niggling feeling came back. He tried calling her, but she didn’t answer. He messaged her but she hadn’t seen it yet. He was worried and that feeling just wouldn’t go away. He needed to practice some of the techniques she taught him, his anxiety was getting the better of him.

He would see Justine this morning for his session and make sure she was okay, and when he saw she was, he would kiss her, then when she tried to take it further, he would resist her. He would resist her until he couldn’t anymore and then he would give in and let her have her way with him until she had satisfied her carnal lust. Just the thought had him grinning like an idiot.

He got dressed and went downstairs, passing his home gym. He hadn’t been working out as much lately. He usually did that to help ease his stress and anxiety, but recently he hadn’t felt the need. He gave Penny a quick cuddle goodbye, she grumbled at him, berating him for leaving her again and then he got in his cruiser. As he buckled up, his phone rang and he huffed, annoyed that something was coming between him and getting to Justine quicker. He pulled out his phone but didn’t recognize the number.

“Deputy Miller,” he answered.

“Hi Blake, this is Dr. Patrick Hall. Just thought I would call to introduce myself and see if we can get our first session arranged?”

“What for?” Blake asked. He didn’t recognize the name, he wasn’t expecting a call from anyone.

“For your treatment? Dr. Rodríguez-Hamilton said you’ve made some significant improvements in the last few months which is fantastic to hear.”

“Justine said what?”

“It’s difficult accepting when you’ve done all you can for a client, but it just goes to her credit that she’s aware she lacks the experience to continue and chose to seek help. I can’t wait to start working together,” Dr. Hall said. Suddenly that niggly feeling made sense; a roaring sound filled Blake’s ears.

“What do you mean, first session?” Blake gritted out, a pit in his stomach forming.

“Oh, jeez. Have I put my foot in it? Has she not told you yet?”

“Told me what?”

“Dr. Rodríguez-Hamilton, Justine, has put in a transfer for you to my office so you’ll no longer be working with her. I’m your new psychologist.”

*

She heard him before she saw him. He banged into the building, stomped into her office coming face to face with her, fury pulsing off him in thick waves. Hilda ran in behind him but Justine signaled everything was fine, so she closed the door.

“Who the fuck is Dr. Hall?” Blake spat. Last time she’d seen him, his eyes had been warm with affection and desire, melting for her. Now they were cold, hard and terrifying.

She swallowed nervously and smoothed her hands over her blouse. She had been dreading this moment, she’d known exactly how he would react, but she still hadn’t been prepared to see him. She wasn’t prepared for how good he looked and the effect he had on her. She wasn’t prepared for the way she wanted to throw herself into his strong arms, bury her face in his neck and beg him to love her. The image tore her insides apart and she steeled herself.

“Deputy Miller, please take a seat,” she said, fixing her professional smile on her face. He sneered when he saw it. She knew he hated it, but it was necessary.

“I’ll stand. Explain. Now.” Each word punctuated with his rage.

“Dr. Hall is much more qualified than myself to treat you. I’m afraid I’ve done as much as I can with you.”

“Bullshit.”

“Deputy Miller, stop cursing in my office.” Her firm tone momentarily seemed to take some of the wind out of his sails, but he rallied.

“How could you do this? After everything?” He shook his head.

“Dr. Hall is a renowned specialist. If I continued to treat you when I knew someone was better qualified that would be detrimental to your progress, so I reached out to him.” Her heart was pounding in her ears as she took in his stony expression.

“You didn’t even tell me, Justine!” he shouted, and she jumped at the sudden lift in volume.

“I was going to,” she lied, her voice quiet because deep inside she knew she’d been too much of a coward to tell him.

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