Page 61 of Following Their Heart

She has an inquisitive, trusting look in her eyes. I want to get lost in her. I want to take her upstairs to my bed and stay there with her for days of lovemaking. But duty calls. Not just the duties of patrolling the camp and getting Jud back, but the duty of being our settlement’s medic. I’ve been failing in those duties, and before I get back to work, I need to apologize.

“Chér,I should have had this talk with you days ago. I’m sorry. Do you want me to find you some birth control pills? I can probably scrounge some up in the pharmacies around town that aren’t too far off their expiration date.”

She blinks. Her eyes widen, like she hasn’t given any thought to birth control.

I’m a shit for not bringing this up sooner. I haven’t been so lucky, but she’s had Grim and Rev inside her. I suspect she’s had Jud too. They spent the whole day together before Raptor showed up with his choppers and his army of birds.

“Oh,” she says. “Um, I haven’t even thought about that. Gosh. You’re right. I should be on a pill or something. Or not.” She widens her eyes in thought. Then she frowns. “I mean—maybe it would be okay if I…you know….”

“Got pregnant,” I fill in for her.

She nods. Her face looks equal parts horrified and curious. “But—” The frown returns. “I haven’t…worked right since the Virus.” Her gaze goes distant. I wonder if what she really means is things haven’t worked right since Leon. “I don’t know if it’s even possible, you know, for me to get…pregnant.”

“Things not working right—you mean you haven’t had a period in a while?” I’ve never talked to a woman about stuff like this before. Even Frannie, my younger sister, handled that stuff herself—thank God. But I’m the medic here. If I don’t talk with Cora about her reproductive health, who the hell will? I’ll be damned if I let her navigate her woman stuff alone. I’ve got some books in my collection of medical texts. Once we get Jud back, I’ll read some of them, freshen up on my female anatomy and physiology.

“I haven’t had a period in two years,” she says.

It’s my turn to frown. That doesn’t sound good. If she were one of the guys, I could use my Gift on her. I could just run my hands over her abdomen and, with hardly a thought, things would heal. But she’s immune to my Gift.

For Cora, I’ll have to do some research. Right now, I don’t know enough to offer advice or medicine. My gut tells me I shouldn’t give her any kind of contraceptive while her insides aren’t doing what they’re meant to. But I’m far from confident about that decision.

“What about before the Virus?” I ask.

“Before, I was fine. Regular cycles. No problems.”

“Any periods after getting the Virus?” I’m trying to nail down whether it was the Virus or Leon that shocked her body off its natural cycle.

“She nods.” A couple,” she says. “They were light. I was weak. Recovering. And then….” She looks away.

Leon.

“Okay. Hey. After things settle down, I’ll look into it, okay. We’ll figure it out together?” I make it a question, and she nods. Her brow smooths. I think she’s relieved I didn’t ask more questions. I’ll probably have to later, but for now, we’ll leave things alone. Except… “I’ll scavenge condoms as soon as I can. We’ll use them until we figure out birth control or—”

“No.” She cuts me off, blushing. “I’m okay with…not using protection. I mean, I don’t want to.”

Surprise makes me go still. I mean, I’m not crazy about condoms, either, but I’ll enforce the rule for everyone if it means protecting her from something she doesn’t want yet. “Even if things aren’t working,chér, you could still get preggers.”

“You think so?”

“I do. I mean, I don’t know for sure, but I think it’s possible. We shouldn’t count on the fact that your insides aren’t in perfect working order to protect you from an unwanted pregnancy.” The famous line from Jurassic Park comes to mind, spoken by Jeff Goldblum:“Life, uh, finds a way.”

“It wouldn’t be unwanted,” she says quietly, after a pause. A small smile curves her pretty lips.

“Is that so?” I feel a crooked smile take over my own face. I can’t help it. The thought of Cora carrying a baby—one of ours—makes me goddamned happy.

“Yeah,” she says, and her smile broadens.

I’m not convinced a pregnancy would be healthy for her so soon after escaping such a horrible situation. Her body is still recovering. Not just her womanly parts, either. Her diet was poor during her captivity. She wasn’t able to be active, so her muscles were weak. She still has healing burns on her back from her horrendous mistreatment. Her body needs time to regain its health before it should be asked to nourish a new life into existence.

Still, if it does happen—if Cora gets pregnant—I’ll find a way to optimize her health. Hers and the baby’s. I’ll do the research and make it my fulltime job to care for them.

With a fantasy of a bouncy-haired little girl or boy running around the lodge, I kiss Cora goodbye and get back to my rounds. And even though things have gone to shit around here, I have a smile on my face.

Chapter 24

Cora

The sun is up,the blinds and curtains are open again, and the guys are digging into a breakfast of pancakes and syrup, canned peaches, and toast with strawberry preserves. Shep and I had breakfast ready earlier than usual, and everyone was just fine with that. None of us got more than a few hours of sleep last night. I have a feeling their minds are too busy for sleep, just like mine.

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