Page 84 of Lavender and Lightning

Lex nods solemnly. “He was understanding at first, but it didn’t take long for the manipulation to start. He had something to hold over me, so the entire power dynamic of our relationship changed. It came to a head right around the time we were discussing plans to open Alice’s Kitchen. Seth wanted the Foundation to back his project, too, but it was a poor investment. With the restaurant, I knew that you, Lucas, had the experience and knowledge of what it actually takes to run a business, and having Rhett as the owner was just a precaution. Seth wanted to open a gym with no business plan, no experience as a trainer or client base. When I told him no, he started threatening to expose me.”

“And he’s been using this against you ever since?” Mateo asks incredulously, getting to his feet.

Lex sighs and looks up from my shoulder at last. She gives a small smile, cupping my cheek lightly for a moment before stepping back. She wipes her face and throws her hair back, straightening her spine.

“Yes, and no. When he threw down the ultimatum, I knew I had to do something. What we’d built was too important to be ruined by one petty omega who can’t take no for an answer.” She turns to look at Rhett, who’s moved to stand a few paces away, the end of the sectional between him and us. “When you approached me about the possibility of making Lucas a more permanent member of this family, I jumped on the opportunity. I could shelter the foundation and all of the work we’ve done behind the protection of a pack. Then it would just be a matter of buying Seth’s silence.”

“So what? You only let me into this pack because–”

“No,” Lex growls, whipping her head around to face Lucas. “Do not think for one microsecond that you aren’t loved, Lucas Klausen. That you aren’t an invaluable part of my life and this family. Rhett can attest to this, but our decision to form a pack, to consider bonding options with you, came long before Wickland House or Alice’s. Everything that happened with Seth was just the push I needed to stop overthinking it, and actually make your place with us official.”

His teeth click as his jaw snaps shut, and the flush of pink that splashes across Lucas’s nose and cheeks is almost too adorable for words. He looks at Rhett with the question in his wide eyes, and Rhett only nods.

“So that’s why he decided to pull that bullshit with his heat, then. He was throwing a fit because he couldn’t get what he wanted,” Mateo says, words twisting with cruel irony.

“Has he been trying to force his way into the pack ever since?” I ask tentatively.

Lex shrugs with one shoulder. “It comes up occasionally, but he’s stopped asking outright. Mostly, I think he just enjoys the power games. If I try to make a move to distance us from him, he brings up what he knows. If he tries to get more out of us, I remind him blackmail is still a crime. We’re at an impasse.”

“What was your end goal? Surely you weren’t going to let this go on forever,” Rhett asks, a little exasperated but mostly earnest.

“No, it wouldn’t. The statute of limitations of my crime is seven years. I was going to try to hold him off until his leverage over me lost its weight, and then I would take all of the evidence I’ve been collecting, every nasty message and email, every transcript of our mediations, all of the diatribe he’s posted on the internet, and use it to get us free of him, once and for all,” she replies, voice firm and steady for the first time since this started.

My heart twists at her phrasing. All past tense, and I don’t have to think very hard at all to figure out what, or rather who, has changed those plans.

“That’s all well and good, but it’s clear that things have gotten out of control. People are burning down buildings in his name. It’s a fucking miracle no one got hurt tonight, and if we just let this go on, we might not be so lucky next time,” Mateo interjects.

Lex nods, but doesn’t speak. I go to step away, to try to put some distance between her and me so I can think, but she grabs my hand, holding it tight. Even still, I can’t force myself to look at her. My mind is swirling faster and faster, each passing moment bringing a fresh wave of guilt. Things hadn’t been like this before I met Pack St. Clair, for them or for me. It wasn’t the best life, but we’d been safe from the demons lurking just outside of our doors. Being together has upset the balance, and for what?

“I don’t disagree, but I think we need to take a step back. It’s clear that this situation is getting out of hand, and we need to do something. But in all honesty, I think the best thing we can do right now is try to deescalate. We lie low, try to get the lawyers involved, maybe…”

She continues on, but her words fade into the growing hum of panic in my mind. I try to pull my hand free again, but Lex refuses to let me go. But wouldn’t it be best if I stepped away from this? The only thing I’ve done for these people is stir up trouble and reopen old wounds. I’m a college dropout, was living paycheck to paycheck with no future and a past I was trying my best to forget. I’m not smart and beautiful like Alexandra, charismatic and charming like Mateo, driven and talented like Lucas, or even grounded and compassionate like Rhett. I don’t bring anything to this pack except problems. Wouldn’t it be easier for me to leave, to let them go before it’s too late?

“…if we’re out of public view for a few weeks, they’ll get bored and move on. And once we’ve gone to court and Lydia has pack protection—”

“Wait, what? That’s in November,” I stammer, speaking over Lex.

She turns and meets my eye, and I’m unsettled by how quickly she’s returned to her calm, unshakable center. But I’ve never felt more off-kilter, my knees liable to give out at any moment. She wants us to hide for that long?

“I can’t do that. I have to go to the wedding,” I continue, my words sounding pathetic even to my own ears.

“Love, you can’t think that’s still a good idea after what happened tonight,” Rhett sighs.

I jump slightly as I realize how close he’s gotten without my noticing, standing just out of arm’s reach of Lex and me. Mateo is closer now, too, leaning against the back of the sectional a few feet to my right. Lucas is still in the kitchen, but there’s a tension to him, like a coiled spring ready to burst at any moment. Returning my focus to Rhett, I look up into his eyes, and my guard goes up instantly at the look of exhausted exasperation.

“It doesn’t matter if it’s a good idea or not. I have to go,” I say, straightening to my full height and setting my shoulders.

“No, you don’t. We can figure out another solution that doesn’t involve you getting within fifty miles of the man hell-bent on killing you,” Rhett retorts.

“If it were one of your sisters in trouble, you wouldn’t let any of us stop you from doing whatever it took to save them,” I throw back. I know it’s a low blow, but my mind is beyond caring. I need him to understand, no matter what.

“That’s not the same—”

“I mean, it kind of is. And besides, if we can figure out how to protect her here, there’s no reason why we can’t figure out how to protect her there,” Lucas says, stepping a little closer.

“As much as I hate to say it, I think Rhett and Lex have a point. Going to that wedding is asking for trouble. Someone could get hurt, and it’s just not worth the risk,” Mateo says softly.

Mateo’s words bounce around my head. Not worth the risk. Asking for trouble. I’m asking for trouble by trying to protect my brother. I rip my hand from Lex’s grip at last, shaking my head as I fight back the tears burning the back of my eyes. She moves to catch me, but I dodge her hold. I stumble across the room, away from the arms trying to grab me, to trap me.

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