Page 58 of Lavender and Lightning

“Running only makes me want you more.”

I gasp, back arching as she bites down on my earlobe, the pleasure-pain spiking through my chest and straight down between my thighs. My hands fly to her back, nails digging as I struggle to keep my grip on reality. Her teeth release my ear, moving instead to nip and scrape along my throat. Her hand in my hair pulls tighter, and my back arches until my chest brushes hers. The hand on my chest curls into a claw, and she drags her nails hard across my collarbone.

“Don’t make this easy on me, sweetness. If you want to play, then play,” she purrs, nibbling on my throat.

The challenge in her words strikes me like a red-hot poker. My own growl is pathetic by alpha standards, and she laughs so seductively that I can’t stand it. Planting my feet, I use my hold on her waist to propel us up and out of the chair. I don’t have the strength to carry her, but I manage to get on top of her as we crash to the floor. I only savor the look of surprise on Alexandra’s face for a moment, and I want to capitalize on the sudden surge of courage. So I lean down and slant my lips over hers.

We both freeze for a heartbeat, but then I melt into the softness of her kiss. Her lips are plumper than any of the boys’, but the difference isn’t unpleasant. If anything, I find myself craving more. I moan and press forward, emboldened by her responsiveness. Her hand in my hair unclenches, holding the back of my head almost tenderly while her hand on my chest drifts to the curve of my waist. I’m so absorbed in the swipe of her tongue against my lower lip that I don’t notice her shifting her weight until it’s too late. Faster than I thought possible, Alexandra has us flipped, with me on my back, her straddling me.

Now that I’ve tasted her, I need more. I try to reach for her face, to bring her lips back to mine, but she catches my wrists and pins them to the floor. Her lips are so close, hovering just above mine as she leans down. I strain my neck, trying to reach her, but she only laughs at my feeble attempts. I try to pull free, but she’s much stronger than she looks. Giving up after only a moment, I stare up with pleading eyes. Amusement dances across her features and I whine, tipping my head back in submission.

“Are you so desperate for my touch that you’d give up that easily?” Alexandra chides, clicking her tongue at me.

“Please,” I pant, my brain too far gone in this place of desire to think straight.

I don’t know how she does this, but I don’t think I care. Alexandra breaks me down into this creature of instinct and need with a few touches, like some sort of magic trick. If she were a different sort of person, this power would be dangerous, and I’d be inclined to run for the hills, screaming. But instead, I trust her to not hurt me while I’m completely at her mercy. And that’s a heady realization that brings me crashing back down to earth.

Alexandra seems to notice the shift in me, letting go of my wrists and sitting up slightly as I stare at the space under the furniture and try not to cry. I never thought I’d let myself feel this vulnerable again, not after everything Darren did to me. But with Alexandra, it doesn’t feel like surrender. It feels like freedom.

“You aren’t going to leave me, Lydia Anderson. Not now, not ever. Do you understand me?” she states mildly, with enough of a dangerous edge to her tone to bring my eyes back up to her face.

The heat is gone, replaced with something altogether more startling: fear. She lets me sit up, moving back until we’re kneeling so close our knees touch. Her words strike a chord in my soul, the weight of them settling on me. She’s trusting me in this moment, showing me where to hurt her the most and hoping like hell I don’t. I reach out slowly, brushing my fingers along her cheekbone until I’m cupping the side of her face in my palm. Ever so slightly, I feel her relax into my touch and I smile warmly.

“I won’t, Alexandra. I promise,” I whisper.

She nods and takes a deep breath before closing her eyes and truly resting her head in my hand.

“Lex,” she says into the silence.

“I’m sorry?” I reply, confused.

“I want you to call me Lex,” she says, opening her eyes.

When I nod, Alexandra’s—Lex’s—face lights up with a smile that makes my entire world glow that much brighter. Deep in my soul, I know I would do whatever it takes to keep her happy and smiling. After all the hardships and pain, she deserves that and so much more. And when she kisses me again, there isn’t a single shred of doubt in my mind of where I belong. Pack St. Clair is my forever.

When Lex pulls away, she cups my face with her palm, and I bring one of mine up to cover it, leaning into her touch. She looks at me for a long stretch, but I don’t mind. At this point, I’d sit here until the building came down around us, as long as she kept looking at me and touching me. But I would never be so lucky. Instead, a soft knock on the door draws both of our attention.

“Just a moment,” Lex calls out, glancing away.

I try not to let my disappointment show on my face as I let her help me up from the floor, straightening my hair and clothes. The knock comes again, but instead of answering, Lex takes my hand and pulls me back to face her.

“Have Caleb take you home, okay? Get some rest and I’ll see you after I’m done for the day,” she instructs kindly.

I nod, squeezing her hand slightly. “Will you be home late?”

Lex’s little laugh brings a hot flush to my cheeks, but I can’t help my returning smile. She brings my hand to her lips and kisses my knuckles gently as the knock comes again, more insistent this time.

“No, not tonight, sweetness,” she replies, promise laced through every syllable.

twenty-five

Lydia

Afewdaysaftermy encounter with Lex, I’m sweeping the shop floor as we get ready to close up for the day. I reach for my pocket, panicking for a moment as I don’t feel the familiar lump of my phone before I remember I gave it to Caleb this morning. I want to let Rhett and Lucas know I’m on my way home, lest I interrupt them again.

Rhett and I have yet to play since the encounter with Mateo in my nest. It’s not that we weren’t intimate; but the sex has been fairly vanilla. And as much as it shocks me to admit it, I miss the feeling of surrender that I get when I’m with Rhett. I know he’ll never press his advantage, and I have a way out if I ever need it. But not having to worry and think and just letting myself enjoy sex is something I didn’t know I needed until Rhett showed me. Maybe we could try to play a game soon.

“You’ve got that look again.”

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