Page 35 of Lilacs and Leather

I nod as I take it, wrapping one of my blanketed hands around the bottom against the heat. It smells savory, almost like chicken, and I blow on it gently to cool before taking a sip. Rhett slides down to the floor near me, leaning against the mattress, one knee bent and his arm resting on it. I sip the broth slowly, watching as Rhett rests his head back against the mattress, his eyes drifting closed. The only light in my apartment comes from the lamp on my bedside table, and a quick glance out of my window shows me it’s the middle of the night.

“So,” I start, nibbling on a cracker as I try to put a sentence together.

“So,” Rhett repeats, not opening his eyes.

“You seem to know what you’re doing,” I comment, trying to keep my tone casual.

Rhett laughs, a smug smile splitting his face. “Glad you enjoyed yourself.”

I blush deeply, scowling at him playfully. “I meant dealing with an omega’s heat.”

He opens his eyes as he turns to look at me, laughing again as he sees me glaring at him. “Lucas’s sisters are omegas. I’ve never been this…hands onwith a female omega before, but he’s told me what sorts of things they would do to get through it,” Rhett explains, still smiling.

“But you’ve been with a male omega in heat before?” I ask, reading between the lines.

His smile falters, eyes growing distant. “Once,” he says simply before turning away and falling silent.

My shoulders slump at the abrupt end to the conversation, and I try to ignore the nagging guilt I feel in my head. I’ve invited a man, an alpha, into my space, let him touch me, and I’ve made it weird by asking questions he’s clearly not comfortable answering. I eat a couple more crackers and finish the mug of broth in the silence. Each tick of the clock sounds like a whip crack, making my skin jump. The warmth of the broth settles strangely in my stomach, and I set the empty mug on the bed. I do my best to stifle a yawn, but Rhett still catches me with a knowing look over his shoulder. I look down, finishing the last cracker in two bites. Rhett stands and takes the dishes back to the kitchenette, setting them in the sink.

I glance around my apartment and realize with a flush that it’s cleaner. The sink full of dirty dishes is now sitting clean in the drying rack, and the clothes and blankets that had been scattered around my floor are now in my hamper next to the bathroom door. I twist the blanket in my hands and chew on my bottom lip. I look back at him as the sink turns off, and he sets the dishes to dry with the others.

“You didn’t have to clean my apartment,” I mutter, thoroughly embarrassed.

He shrugs, turning around to lean on the counter with his arms crossed over his bare chest. There’s a small four-leaf clover tattooed over his heart. I drag my eyes away from it to meet his piercing blue stare. The look is neutral, but I shrink away. My lower lip trembles as I sit under his scrutiny. After a long moment, I look away, unable to take it anymore. My vision blurs as my thoughts spiral. This was a mistake.

“I’m really sorry about this. We barely know each other, but I’m throwing myself at you and you want to take it slow, and it’s not fair to you—”

“First of all, you didn’t throw yourself at me. I offered to help you,” Rhett says matter-of-factly, speaking over my frantic words.

“But I shouldn’t be so…” My voice cracks, and I hide my face in my hands as tears break free and slide down my cheeks.

“Hey, hold on. Look at me, Lydia,” Rhett says, words much softer now.

I shake my head, burrowing deeper into my blanket. I hear his footsteps approach, and the bed dips a little next to me. Gentle hands wrap around my wrists, pulling them away from my face. I look to see Rhett kneeling on the floor next to the bed, looking up at me with worry in his eyes. I sob a little at the kindness in his face, and I look away quickly. He cups the side of my face, pulling me back around to look at him again, his thumb wiping away a tear.

“Talk to me, love. What’s got you all tied up in knots?” he questions.

I take a shuddering breath, and he lets me sit for a moment, all patience. I swallow a little, bracing myself. “I’ve been so selfish. You’re here taking care of me, and I haven’t…taken careof you,” I whisper.

Rhett lets out a sharp exhale through his nose. “That’s not—”

“But I’m in heat. You must need it, and I don’t want you to feel neglected,” I cut across him, trying to move closer.

Rhett puts his hands on my shoulders over the blanket, stopping me. His eyes are flashing, and I shrink away from the intensity. He sighs at my reaction and shakes his head a little.

“We are going ta have a long talk here real soon, only so I can figure out who filled your head with all these backwards fucking ideas. And then I’m going ta find them and set t’em ta right,” he says, the dangerous growl at the edge of his voice making me shiver.

“I don’t understand,” I whimper.

He looks at me for a long moment, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. “Just because you are an omega in heat, it doesn’t give me the right to your body. Do I want you? God, yes. Every cell in my body is telling me to take you until the only thing you know is me. But it would be such an extreme violation of your trust to take advantage of you like that.”

My stomach clenches at his words even as my brow furrows. “Take advantage?” I repeat, confused.

Rhett nods. “It would be like taking you to bed when you’ve had too much to drink. Your heat impairs your ability to make decisions and lowers inhibitions. You might ask for something that, once this passes, you truly didn’t want. It’s just not a line I’m comfortable crossing.”

I frown, and the feeling of guilt rises again. “I shouldn’t have put you in this position,” I mutter, looking away.

Rhett’s fingers gently tilt my chin to look at him again. “I wouldn’t have come here if I thought I couldn’t control myself. I want to help you. And when this is over, we are going to figure out what comes next, I promise.”

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