Page 134 of Jig's Last Dance

His eyes flicker and he looks away. “Even before, it would have been impossible, but now . . .”

Of course, this is why Ben and Mandy were sneaking around. They weren’t supposed to be friends, much less lovers, and the series of events that followed their secret affair ruined us all. For what? Love?

Ha! And Jig?

If I give in to what I want, which is him, can we exist with the lies between us? Eventually, he’ll find out; how could he not? And if he didn’t, my soul would surely shrivel with each day I looked into his bright eyes and continued to lie.

If I keep with this stupidity, his brightness will die.

My brother killed his sister. My father got rid of her body like she didn’t matter. Even now, John is waiting for me to bring Rain to him, and I haven’t said a thing.

I can choose. Grab what I want and be the selfish bastard all the others have been or walk and spare Jig the fate that’s coming for us.

Deep down, I’m not sure he’s truly prepared for this anyway. But if I walk, am I leaving him a shell?

Does it matter? He was a shell when I met him. I can’t save him. I can’t save anyone—except maybe the next girl in John and Castinetti’s game, a girl named Liberty.

It’s all I have left and it will be what carries me through this mess once I’m gone.

Pulling away, I shake my head and touch the handle on the door. But Jig grabs my arm and says, his beautiful blazing eyes dulled, “This is it then?”

Looking away, because I’m a coward, I clear my throat and say, “We did what we had to. But now it’s over.”

“Is it? Or are you afraid?” he rasps, grabbing my chin.

With a careless shrug that hurts my soul, I murmur, “It was fun. Nice. But—”

“Nice,” he growls, and I close my eyes. I have to be strong, but it’s killing me.

“Jig.”

“Eating ice cream is nice. Seeing a movie is nice. This isn’t nice, Alice.”

“Maybe, but it’s true. You tried to kill my dad, Jig. My br-dad killed your sister. It’s—”

“None of that matters,” he says, slashing his hand through the air. “Do you want to be with me?”

His eyes search mine with the light I’ve come to crave, and my heart clenches brutally as I whisper, “No.”

The passion I adore fades from his eyes, and he drops his hand. I fight back tears as he says, “Then that’s it.”

Without responding, I walk away. I have to.

Chapter Twenty

After our brutal conversation, I walked the two miles to my house. I’ll go back for the money later, but I needed time to clear my head.

The door is unlocked, thank fuck, and I groan as I ease onto the couch, rubbing my face warily.

I cried the entire way, but now I have to let it go because I have to be sure of whatever decision I make. If I do nothing, I’m consigning Ben to death. But Rain?

Can I sacrifice her to save him? Fuck me.

Of course, I’m given little time to consider because my phone buzzes in my hand, and Sal’s name glares at me from the screen.

“Hello?” I say quietly, glancing at a picture of Ben and me from years ago resting on the end table. I’m five and he’s eight. We’re hugging with our cheeks pressed together.

The sight makes me smile, but it fades when Sal says, “What did your father say to you on that mountain?”

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