Page 76 of A Constant Blaze

“That’s one of the sweetest things anyone’s ever said to me.”

“I don’t believe that for a moment.”

She laid her head on his shoulder. “Maybe I like you, too.”

She must have fallen asleep like that. She certainly never woke Tomas. She guessed Muiredach did, for when she did wake, she lay beside the harpist, each wrapped respectably in their own blankets. The relentless patter and splash of rain had stopped. At the cave mouth, the fire had gone out but was still smoking gently in front of Tomas, who sat there yawning silently as the first light of dawn seeped in. Mairead felt oddly peaceful. The new day seemed to bring hope.

*

They made amore sluggish start that morning than they’d intended. The men-at-arms walked to Doldencha and brought back fresh bread and eggs, which Mairead and Grizel cooked over the revived fire. Only once their fast was broken did they pack everything up and prepare to leave.

Everyone else was outside, saddling and packing the horses, when the lady said abruptly to Mairead, “What will you do, now?”

“I don’t know, yet. Go back to the Isles, perhaps. The Lady Ranghilde has always been kind to me.” Mairead finished rolling her bedding back up and reached for the dried reeds to tie around it.

Halla said curiously, “Would you reconcile with your husband? If you could?”

Mairead curled her lip. “And play the contrite, forgiven wife? I don’t think I could, supposing he ever truly forgave me, which he wouldn’t. I don’t blame him. I wronged him and misled him, even if not in the way that he imagines. He will repudiate me. After all, I never gave him children.”

The lady took a deep breath. “Between you and my family is more than debt. Come home with us to Ross.”

Mairead glanced up quickly and the half-tied reed sprang straight again. “To your hall?” she asked carefully.

“Of course. In the first instance, at least.”

Mairead met her gaze and read there no malice or fear. She recognized and admired Halla for what she was: a strong, independent woman with a streak of responsibility that Mairead lacked. And yet she was conscious now of a wish to be like her, not for Malcolm’s sake but for her own. In other circumstances, Halla could have been her friend, which made it all the harder.

“Lady, it could not work,” she blurted. “I believe you know nothing improper ever occurred between your husband and me. And you probably know that was his choice, not mine. My presence would make you uncomfortable in the end. And your inevitable suspicion would hurt me as well as you. I thank you for your generosity, but I can’t live in your hall.” With unnecessary force, she finished tying the reed and rose to her feet.

“We should be friends, Mairead,” Halla said. “For what you have done for my family, I have no words.”

Mairead shook her head, blinded by sudden, foolish tears.

Halla laid one hand on her shoulder. “For your own safety, come with us into Ross. Wherever you go after that, within Ross or without, is your choice.”

“Thank you,” Mairead muttered. Briefly, she touched Halla’s hand on her shoulder and walked away.

“Muiredach is a good man,” Halla said to her back. “And more suited by birth than you might think.”

Damn her, did she see everything? Mairead glanced over her shoulder. “The truth is, lady, right now I don’t want Muiredach or any man.” Not even Malcolm MacHeth. She caught the faint flicker of amusement in the lady’s eyes that said,Liar,louder than any words. She was the lady.

Mairead gave a slightly crooked smile and walked out of the cave with her bedroll. Muiredach took it from her before she’d even registered his presence and strode away with it to tie it to her saddle. She followed, hoping in spite of herself to catch his eye. Because of their unexpected closeness last night. Because of his kisses.

He turned and boosted her into the saddle, turning away immediately to seize the reins of his own horse. No words, no secret touches or smiles, or even looks.

Mairead leaned forward and stroked her horse’s ears, leaning down to whisper in them, “I think I’ve been spurned.”

The horse twitched its ears and snorted.

“That’s what I think,” Mairead agreed.

Muiredach gave no indication that he’d heard.

*

Skirting the mountains,it took them three days through the foothills before they reached the River Ness and crossed into Ross. Almost immediately, they were met by a relieved Donald and his following.

“Where the devil have you been?” Donald demanded, throwing himself off his horse to kiss the hands of his parents. “Did you attack Angus without us?”

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