Page 50 of Stuck with the Grump

“You’ve been good to me.” She shook her head and smiled. “Older brother’s best friend, what a cliché.”

I laughed and pulled her in for a hug, unable to keep my hands off her any longer. “You are going to do so many amazing things with the gallery. Maybe after you open it, we could meet for coffee and talk?”

The smile fell from her face, replaced with a brief flash of fear. I hated that look on her face, but I knew the reason it was there. She sighed and stepped out of the hug, shaking her head.

“With the cameras that follow you around, are you sure that’s a good idea? The paparazzi are only going to get worse once you go to trial.”

I sighed, anger rising though I only had myself to blame. I should never have let those pictures hit the media. Maybe if I had stopped them, we would be having a different conversation right now. Maybe if I had done a lot of things differently, she and I would be looking at a different future once we left this house.

What bothered me the most was that I would never know. There was no way of knowing which action had damned our relationship and which would save it.

“I’m sorry about all of that,” I said, twisting a tendril of her hair around my finger. “I should have buried them.”

“Things happen,” Leigh said. “I wish that they hadn’t but there is nothing that either of us can do about that now. I’ve moved on. You should too.”

“Will you at least let me know that you got back to the city?” I asked, my heart pounding in my chest. “Let me know that you’re safe so I don’t worry about you being lost in a ditch somewhere?”

“Of course.”

“You know, if I knew it was going to be this hard, I might have done some sort of rain dance to make the weather worse.”

Leigh laughed and shook her head. “You would never do something like that.”

“You never know. If it meant spending more time with you, I might have.” I grinned and leaned forward to kiss her slowly. Our mouths moved together in a well-practiced routine until she pulled away with rosy cheeks. “I know you have to go. I’m going to miss you.”

She stood on her toes and pressed a kiss to my cheek before opening her car door. “Goodbye, Clarke.”

“Goodbye, Leigh.”

As she got in the car and drove away, she didn’t look back. I couldn’t blame her for that. Some things were better off as a distant memory.

There was a part of my mind that was screaming at me to chase after her. The louder part of me, the more logical part, knew that following her would only get me in trouble.

Once her taillights faded from sight, I went back into the house and headed straight for the backyard. Though the sun was still out, I lit a fire and grabbed the blanket Leigh had cast aside the night before. The scent of her perfume still clung to it as I sat down in her chair and wrapped myself in the blanket.

This was the best thing that we could have done with the situation we were given. She had a gallery to open, her mom was going through cancer treatment, and I would be dealing with a trial soon. Leigh was right about the paparazzi too. Once the news broke about the embezzlement and the trial, I wouldn’t know another moment of peace for a while. There would be more people watching me everywhere I went and waiting for a piece of information they could use. Being directly in the public eye would put Leigh there too. She didn’t want to be followed by cameras everywhere. She deserved a private life.

Still, I could see where she would fit into my world. I could see myself leaving the office earlier than I used to so I could come home to her that much sooner. If I closed my eyes, I could see us sitting around a fire and laughing, knowing that we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. I could see her fitting in with my world easily, laughing and charming businessmen and women. We would spend some afternoons at her gallery, and she would explain art to me over and over again with the hope that I would one day understand.

There was an entire life waiting for us and there was no way we would ever be able to achieve it. Our lives were too different to line up. Our timing was wrong and I wasn’t sure it would ever be right.

Staring into the fire, I wondered what she would do if I showed up at her doorstep weeks from now, wanting a chance with her. Once the dust had settled and there was a chance at us living a normal life, would she still want me? I couldn’t expect her to sit around and wait for me. It wouldn’t be fair to her.

I’d be returning to the city to an empty apartment. Nobody would be waiting for me on the other side of the door. No one to share my life with. When I went home, I was going home to be alone. I was going home to sit in a silent four walls and wonder why nothing was simple.

It should have been as simple as telling her that I loved her. I would change my whole life around to be with her if she would let me. But I knew if I had even offered, she would have told me to fuck off and live my life.

On the other hand, who fell in love with a woman they barely knew so quickly? Who spent several days with a person and knew that they wanted to spend the rest of their life with them? It was insanity. Yet, I knew that I loved her more than I had ever loved anybody else.

Leaning back in the chair, I stared at the fire and watched the flames lick at the sky. Smoke rose high, wafting away on the wind. How long had she and I spent in front of a fire? I would never be able to sit in front of one again without thinking about Leigh.

Hell, I wouldn’t be able to visit the lake house without thinking of everything we had done while we were together. Her face would haunt me each time I tried to take a trip up here. It would be a miracle if I could fall asleep tonight without her pressed against me. As soon as I started dreaming, she would be there, waiting for me.

I sighed and pulled the blanket closer to me, inhaling her perfume. One of us had to make the hard decision to walk away. She seemed to be better at it than me. I still wanted to chase after her, but I wouldn’t.

Thirteen years and a hundred reasons to not be together stood between us.

23

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