Page 99 of Whiskey Splash

“I don’t care.”

Our eyes connect and he’s determined, his features hard and ready to take on what someone might say about us. A little piece of my heart melts seeing the determination in him. I want to believe it, not that I don’t think he’d defend me, I just wish it was enough.

“I care,” I say softly, stepping away from the box and leaving it behind on the table. Something in me breaks as I do it.

I love that dress.

I love the way I feel in it and the way he looks at me when I wear it.

Desmond’s golden eyes catch mine as if he can feel the weight of that box being left behind and he isn’t ready to let it go. But I can’t go to the wrap party. It was all a fairytale in the first place, anyway. Everything with Desmond was, that’s what this photo has taught me. Desmond and me—together—that was a lovely dream, a lovely fantasy I got to play out for a little while. But nothing in our life would ever be private again, and I can’t live like that. I just can’t.

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” I say, putting on a fake smile. “Even if I wanted to go, I’m not allowed on resort property. That includes Flambé.”

“Then we’ll change the venue!” Desmond insists, but I shake my head.

“Please don’t do that to Arie,” I ask kindly. “She’s worked so hard on that wrap party. It’s important to her. Please don’t take it away from her. I’d never forgive you if you did.”

“Fine, they can keep the party at Flambé, but I won’t go!”

“You have to go, Desmond. You’re the star.” I put my suitcase down and walk over to him. “You owe it to the crew, you know that.”

His hand finds my cheek. “Then I’ll take you somewhere else to wear that dress.”

“So the paparazzi can take pictures of us again?”

“Somewhere indoors. Without windows.”

I tilt my head into his hand and close my eyes, savoring the warmth of his touch. “I’ve spent too many years of my life in that prison,” I admit. I open my eyes again to look at him. “You showed me the sun, Desmond, and Iwant the sun. I don’t want to live without it ever again.”

His eyes falter as I say that, realizing this is the problem with our relationship. I want both the sun and privacy, but with Desmond, I can only have one.

“I want you,” his voice is low, barely a whisper, and I turn my face into his palm and kiss it before removing his hand from my cheek.

“You know how that’s going to turn out,” I say softly, nodding to the fact that I’ve packed a bag and I can’t even bear to be in my own apartment anymore.

“Where will you be? I leave in a week.”

I shrug, dropping his hand. “I don’t know,” I say honestly. “Maybe I’ll call you when I get a new battery for my phone.” I nod to the empty phone next to my suitcase. “Or maybe I’ll forgo the phone and just disappear in the silence.”

“I have your sister’s number,” he says, not giving up, and I smile at his insistence.

“True,” I admit. “But she’s loyal to me. It’s a twin thing.”

He takes a deep breath, his face begging me not to do this, to not disappear from his life. Some things are not easy to let go of. Some things can’t simply be lost.

“I’ll never forget you showed me the sun,” I say softly, stepping forward and kissing him at the edge of his mouth, lingering longer than I should. “Thank you.” His hand cups my head long enough to feel the weight of this rushing out between us.

I step back and his fingers fall from my hair.

I step back and tear open the space between us.

I step back and take my suitcase, turning to the open door of my flat, beyond which lies so much I’m unsure of. Behind me stands the one man I never thought I’d be walking away from, but there’s no way around how impossible it is for us to be together.

Weis something I don’t know how to survive, not because I don’t want to give him my heart, but because the world around us is too cruel and has crushed us before we ever had the chance.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Naomi puts me up in her parents’ beach-rental. They own a tiny bungalow on the quiet side of Oahu about thirty minutes from the bustle of Honolulu. It’s the perfect hideout, snuggled in the palm trees and far away from the city. There are no honking cars, no tourists crowding the beach, no sign of life. It’s just me in a hammock with a view of the endless ocean—a thousand miles of possibilities in front of me.

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