Page 15 of High-Rise Heat

“I hardly know you,” I say finally, which makes him smile against my cheek.

“Are you the kind of woman who needs that? For us to have a history?” he asks, his hands dropping to small of my back. I lift my head and look at him, searching his brown eyes and unsure what I’m looking for.

“Not exactly,” I say cautiously. “The weird part is Ifeellike I already know you. Even though IknowI don’t. And—” I swallow hard, trying to sort through the embarrassment of this truth. “I suppose that reveals an unspoken desperation in me.” I admit, looking down at his chin for a moment. “I’m well aware that I’m projecting onto you.” I take a breath and look up. “Wanting you to mean something, to be something that—”

“Makes you forget what you really want instead?” he finishes for me, and my mouth is dry, not sure what to say to that. But then I shake my head.

“I wouldn’t put it that way, exactly. It’s really …” He waits, watching me, and I search his eyes, not sure if there’s a way to articulate the familiarity that comes from sharing this moment—the touch of his hands, the confusion of something new in me waking, and how my heart brays with its uncertainty. “You make me hopeful,” I say finally.

His grip tightens and his eyes narrow. That’s not what he expected.

“It’s different than history,” I continue. “And there’s this weight that makes it feel important. You make me see someone else—someone new—another person I could become.”

Isaac slides his cheek up against mine, pressing his rough stubble into my cheekbone. It’s a hug again, but something more, something where we’re tucked into each other and wondering who we are.

“Your hesitation …” he says softly. “You’re not sure who you’d leave behind?”

“Are you speaking of him or me?”

“Both.”

The word rings against my ear.Both.Choosing Isaac means walking way from two parts of my life. “We have a history,” I say. “Dom and I …”

But Isaac shakes his head. “That’s not what I meant. I mean the possibility. The person you’ve wanted to become all this time. The life you’ve dreamed of having with him.”

I’m quiet for a moment, realizing there are three parts to this. There’s the man I respect and adore and let steal my heart—the man with whom I have two years of past with. Then there’s the team we are now, the two of us unstoppable and brilliant. Yet, I’ve clouded that with all the things I’ve imagined and wished for. Isaac’s right, there’s a third part to this. There’s the future, the life I thought I always wanted. The future I imagined and—

“It’s just a dream,” I say quietly, and Isaac’s hand runs up my spine again.

“So is this one, if you think about it.”

A shiver runs through me and I pull back to look at him, realizing how unpredictable this all is, how there’s no certainty in the future. Any future. Dreams are nothing but projections, beautiful illusions made of little more than faith and air. I look around us at the shimmering ballroom, sparkling with lanterns and tiny crystals refracting the light into a thousand tiny pieces—made of nothing solid—a thousand tiny rainbows that swirl and mesmerize me, but I cannot catch.

I look at Isaac and wonder what I’ve been chasing all this time.

“Maybe I didn’t realize who else I could be,” I say, realizing there’s only one thing I can rely on and that’s myself—whoIchoose to be. “Maybe I’ve been so singularly focused, I didn’t know what else I could have.”

He looks at me deeply, something torn in his eyes, and it’s the first time I’m unsure if he wants to do this. “Ilsa, I have to be clear,” he says. “I’m not offering—”

“And I’m not asking,” I interrupt him, shaking my head. “I know exactly what you’re offering, and I’m not expecting anything more than …” I lick my lips and look at him squarely, spreading my hands over his broad shoulders. “This isn’t about yesterday, or tomorrow. It’s about today and who I choose to be. And whatIwant.”

Isaac’s hands slide over my shoulder blades and a mist of desire breaks across my skin. The edge of his thumbs tuck under my spaghetti straps and this dress feels erotically sexy. It feels like I’ll soon be un-wearing it and shedding it along with this girl that I’ve been. A balloon of excitement surges through me. I’d forgotten what it feels like to be filled with the possibility of something new, to be wild and young and acting recklessly. It makes me realize how tired I am of waiting and calculating the risk, of keeping things lined up so perfectly. Suddenly, all I want is this spark of heat that is raw and rejuvenating.

“May I cut in?”

His words shock me.

His voice—the one voice I don’t want to hear, not right now—Dom’s voice.

I pull away from Isaac to see Dominick a few feet away. He’s perfect—always perfect, in his tux, with his red hair brushed and gorgeous. His green eyes lit on us.

I look at Isaac quickly, realizing Iwantto leave the banquet with him. That this is a choice Icanmake, that I want to make, and yet—

Isaac doesn’t miss a beat. He turns to his friend smoothly. “Of course, Dom,” he says, smiling broadly. “It’s a big day for the two of you. Congratulations on the deal. Please …” Isaac twirls me away from him and I immediately miss the connection of his body. I land directly in front of Dom, weak and uneasy on my feet and staring into the eyes of the man I was ready to walk away from. My boss, my fantasy, the man I was certain I needed.

And do I?

I don’t think so, except …

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