Page 56 of Date and Switch

Sera looked as if I’d slapped her. Omar held his hand up as if he expected the two of us to get into a fist fight. As if I would ever lay my hand on someone.

I couldn’t look at her. I nearly drown in the fathomless depth of empathy and confusion I saw in her rounded eyelids. Those feelings that turned her normally chocolate brown eyes amber colored.

“I’ll be back in our room, whenever you are done chatting.”

I didn’t even acknowledge the two of them again. I turned on my heel and made my way back the way I came.

“Just think about it, Sera. You wouldn’t even have to audition. We can fly back to Miami, you’d have a few weeks of training and boom! Off to destinations unknown.”

That pinhead’s voice carried, following me as if his voice continued tapping me on my back demanding I turned around and pay attention.

“We’ll see,” Sera replied. “It does sound like a great opportunity. It might be fun to try something new.”

I couldn’t bear to hear another word. I double timed it back to the room. I felt caged, trapped with my own emotions. I needed to go for a run. I had too many feelings that needed sorting through.

And then Sera walked in.

thirty-six

Hurt. Confused. Bewildered. All emotions I was all too familiar with while I’d spent the last two hours fake smiling while cruisers played stupid games for various prizes. I didn’t feel like smiling. I also couldn’t bear another minute alone in my room. I wanted to find Bryce, but I didn’t want to see him until knew what I was feeling and why.

Jumbled. I felt jumbled. On one hand I totally understood why he was in an emotional tailspin. That side of me wanted to seek him out and provide him with a safe space to work through whatever residual feelings he had.

Annoyed. There was a part of me that wanted to shake Bryce’s pretty fucking head till the sense rattled back into place. Since that karaoke night that felt like ages ago, I thought he’d exorcized his Sarah demon. That he moved on and realized that their separation had been for the best. Yet here we were months later, and we were right back at the starting line.

Pissed the fuck off. Who was he to come storming into the theater and embarrass me in front of someone who’d been a great friend? Suddenly because he decided he wanted to talk; I was supposed to be waiting doe eyed in our room wondering when he’d return? Fuck that.

“You have no right treating me like I’m the one in the wrong.” I marched straight to our room and confronted him as soon as I walked in the door. “Omar has been a good friend to me. You act as if you’ve been sitting here for two days wondering where I was, and not the other way around.”

He sat on the bed; his head buried in his hands.

“You’re right. It was a dick move. I saw you with him and reacted.”

He caught me off guard. I’d been expecting some kind of confrontation. I wanted something to react to. If not his insolence, or a haughty attitude, anything that I could push against. Instead, it was as if he lay in the street and waited for the bus to run over him.

“I’m confused, Sera. Seeing that wedding dress brought back too many memories. Not even just the bad ones. It was as if that piece of fabric showing up was the last showing of the highs and lows of Bryce Ellis and Sarah Miller.”

“You’re confused?” I guess it was my turn to be the insolent one. “I’m sorry but I think your time to be confused ran out of steam a few weeks back. You know who’s confused, Bryce? I am. You know why?”

I could feel my pulse behind my eyeballs. I tried hard to keep my breathing steady lest I erupt into tears that would only be spurred on by the adrenaline spike.

“First—you told me there was zero room for anything more than friends and I was totally okay with that. Granted you are a very attractive person. You can be super sweet and charming, and I crushed on you so hard. But I could have easily remained with my emotions in check. You run so damn hot and cold.”

I wasn’t the kind of person that could just randomly spew facts whenever faced with a confrontation. I should have taken a second and written down what I wanted to say instead of just starting to word vomit all over the cabin.

“You said you loved me, Bryce. Was that even true?”

Whatever else needed to be said didn’t really matter if that one simple question couldn’t be answered.

“Sera.” He had yet to look at me. He sat on the bed, his head in his hands, rubbing his forehead while I talked.

“Don’t Sera me. Especially when for most of this trip, it’s been Angel—except for when you told me you loved me, and then it was Seraphim. So yes or no? Are you in or are you out. Because this wishy washy I love you, but I also miss my ex-girlfriend crap is getting stale.”

“You’re issuing ultimatums now”?” His eyes sparked like flint against quartz, blazing when we locked eyes for the first time since I’d come into the room.

“Issuing them? No. I’m speaking the truth. Or asking for it. And you refuse to answer it. Are you in love with me?”

“Sera.” Just my name. Again. Only this time his voice held an edge of warning. Almost a growl. As if just by speaking I had forced him into some unnecessary action.