Page 10 of Date and Switch

“I figured I’d just go with standard black.”

I pulled the black dress from the closet where I’d hung it no more than five minutes previous.

“You didn’t bring any formal wear?” He asked, looking confused.

“It’s lace?” I held it up so he could see the intricate detail of the fabric. It was my go-to for practically any function I had to attend. With some pearls and heels, it felt pretty fancy to me. No one would have any idea I bought it for $49 at a Clear the Racks event at Sax Fifth Avenue.

“That’s a cocktail dress.”

He pointed at my dress, while picking up the house phone once again and pressing the call button. The person on the other line picked up and he directed them to send the store manager to our cabin.

“Is there something wrong with a cocktail dress?”

I was quite proud of how multifunctional I’d been when considering my wardrobe. Nearly everything I brought could be worn multiple times throughout the cruise. If I swapped jewelry and shoes, wore a shawl one time and went bare shouldered another, it was as if each of my dresses were three looks in one.

“The Captain’s Ball tends to lean towards tuxedos and gowns.”

He explained, just as there was a brisk knock at our cabin door. Damn. The people on the ship moved at hyper speed. A woman who introduced herself as Doreen entered our living room just as I exited the bedroom, lace dress still in hand.

“Doreen, please have one of your associates send up a collection of dresses for Ms. Miller appropriate for tonight’s gathering.”

Doreen pushed her glasses further down the bridge of her nose. I was wearing the bare minimum in terms of makeup, my braided hair I’m certain stuck every which way considering I’d been upstairs on the deck for a solid hour waving goodbye to all the people on the shore. I never changed from my tank top or shorts. Surely though, everyone on the ship was used to people walking around looking super casual given it was a ship intended for vacation. The moment she laid eyes on me I could feel the judgement in her scrunched-up nose and upturned lip.

“I’m sorry Mr. Ellis. We don’t carry dresses of her size in stock.”

After all of the weirdness of the last few hours, I hadn’t thought it was possible to feel any more self-conscious than I had. Day one and already someone took an opportunity to call me out as less than. Just what I needed was for Bryce to be embarrassed by me for the next seven months because god forbid the dumb gift shop decided they didn’t need to carry extended sizes.

seven

Charmed. That was the perfect word for watching Sera flit about for the last few hours. I’d learned very little over the last month about her. Other than the important details like whether or not she had medical allergies or who her next of kin would be in the case of an emergency. She was a twin, I knew that. Born on Christmas Eve—hence the very Christmassy sounding formal name. Seraphim. Like a Christmas angel.

She found delight in the most simplistic things. She’d giggled when the steward ran through what I knew was their usual checklist of guest likes and dislikes. How we preferred our coffee, what time we usually woke up in the morning, if we preferred to dine upstairs or in our stateroom. I’d never seen anyone so enthusiastic to go through a muster drill or be so disappointed when it wasn’t nearly as exciting as the name promised.

However, the moment that would forever be burned into my memory was how she’d nearly thrown herself overboard waving and calling goodbye to everyone in the port as we’d pushed off and left Miami. That kind of wide-eyed enthusiasm elicited more smiles from me in the past seven hours than I remember possessing in a really long time. Selfishly, I wanted to continue to ensure she had a million more of those moments. Mainly because they helped me forget the gaping, bleeding hole that still hadn’t healed. A two second smile may seem like too short a reprieve but ask a drowning man if he can collect enough air to breathe in two seconds.

“What do you mean you can’t dress her size?”

Sera and I stood at opposing posts between the shop manager, Doreen. She still held her little black dress in her hands. It was a beautiful dress. I could see in her eyes that her opinion of her dress altered between when she’d shown it to me and now. That hadn’t been my intent at all.

“I apologize sir, but because of the necessity to save space, we only carry gowns in standard sizing. Our largest dress is a size ten. If I had to venture a guess, Ms. Miller is between a sixteen and eighteen American, which is an extended size.”

“Extended size?” I caught Sera’s gaze, her melted chocolate-colored eyes broadcasting a tornado of emotion that pinched my throat closed. After spending the day bathing in her delight, the absolute last thing I wanted to experience was her pain. “Doreen, your attitude displeases me.”

“I’m sorry your unhappy sir, however we have to plan our purchases with a conversative eye. There are two thousand people on board this ship. We need to accommodate the largest percentage of that population. Unfortunately carrying clothing for larger sizes from both a space consumption and an inventory standpoint would be unwise. Not just Americans sail these cruises.”

Women’s clothing wasn’t my area of expertise. It wasn’t something I paid attention to. Sera however, looked no different than any average woman I saw on the street every damn day. She leaned against the door jamb, nervously rolling to her tip toes and back down over and again. That had to be from her music or theater training. It seemed like move a dancer would take comfort in. Pushing nervous energy into movement.

Until Doreen had even suggested that Sera wasn’t “normal” in her size, I’d barely noticed the shape of her body. Nothing seemed out of sorts. She was definitely a lovely hourglass, but beneath her tank top and shorts I couldn’t tell what would be amiss that Doreen felt the need to call out her size or shape.

“Doreen, Ms. Miller is beautiful. The fact that your attitude and general demeanor would make her feel anything but that has certainly left a dark mark on my opinion of this cruise line. At the onset of a long adventure like this, I shouldn’t be experiencing this is the type of customer service on day one. Please send your tailor in. Clearly, I’ll need to speak to him about special orders.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but I needed her to leave. Sera looked as if she were about to cry, and that was not something I could handle. Not from her. Not after she’d been delighted less than an hour ago.

“That is all, Doreen. Thank you.”

“We don’t have to go tonight,” Sera offered the moment the door shut. “I didn’t realize there were different levels of dress code for their formal nights.”

Her dress hung at her side. The delicate velvet strip along its hem crumpling against the cabin’s carpeting. Even if I hadn’t witnessed the castigation from the resident shopkeeper, Sera’s posture screamed embarrassment and defeat. I wanted to hug her. To cast aside social graces and provide a moment of comfort. Something held me back from acting on that instinct.

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