Page 34 of A Touch Charmed

If I’d known that was the last time I’d see him, I might’ve done everything differently. Instead, I watched him walk away, while I did what I did best and stayed quiet.

The smoke swirled again. Finn called my name, but I was lost. Lost to the pain, lost to the memories. My magic pounded my ribs like a warning, but I couldn’t grasp it. It was the end all over again, and just like last time, I was powerless. Before I could crawl my way back to the present, I got dragged into another memory.

I sat alone in my room in the guest house. Finn said we’d talk after he had some time to cool off, but it had been hours. He’d left every one of my texts on read. We’d never fought like this before. He’d never talked to me like that before. We were falling apart and I didn’t know how to stop it. Or how to keep him without sacrificing myself.

My phone buzzed in my hand and I fumbled with it before opening my lock screen. Finally. I hoped he was ready to apologize for ruining what should’ve been one of the proudest moments of my life. But my heart dropped when I picked up my phone and saw the text from Olivia.

Where are you?Attached to a picture of Finn and Wes laughing next to a roaring bonfire. There were a ton of people in the background.

Awesome. I’d just walked out on a silent dinner with my parents and spent my last night on the island sitting alone in my room while I waited for my boyfriend to answer my texts. And he’d been at a party. Hanging out and having a great time without me. Why did he care if I didn’t come home for winter break? Seemed like he’d get along just fine on his own.

The smoke swirled again. Taking me back to my last morning on the island.

The day my heart shattered beyond repair.

I’d lost my phone in the middle of the night. I’d gone to bed with it clutched between my hands, but when I woke up it was gone. When my father came to the guest house to give me a check for next semester’s tuition, I found it on the kitchen counter.

I had no idea how it had gotten down there, but I wished it had stayed missing.

One text from Finn.I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.

That couldn’t mean what I thought. My fingers went numb as I typed back as fast as I could manage.You said we would talk. This can’t be all you have to say.

The three dots appeared and reappeared as my life hung in the balance. After an eternity, his last text to me came through.I think we said it all last night. Good luck with your new life. I hope you get everything you want.

I slammed my phone on the counter and gripped my hair by the roots. This couldn’t be the end. We’d been through too much to throw it away over a stupid fight.My ferry leaves in an hour. If you aren’t there to meet me, I guess I’ll know for sure. Please be there.

He didn’t respond.

He didn’t show up to the ferry either. I texted him again when I got to the mainland, left voicemails, asked him to meet at a restaurant in Boston we always went to when he’d visit. I sat in a booth for five hours. Alone. After my waiter gently reminded me for the third time that they were closing, I went home and cried myself to sleep. It really was over.

A week later, people started texting me about Olivia and Finn. The evidence was all over her Instagram, dozens of pictures of the two of them at Leo’s together, drinking, laughing, him whispering in her ear. The texts about it kept coming. No one would let me let go.

By the time Olivia FaceTimed me, I was at my breaking point. She opened with tears and apologies for hooking up with Finn, but I didn’t want to hear it. I was fully done. I blocked her and Finn, then proceeded to block every person who texted me about them. Until I’d shut out every connection to Zodiac Cove I had left.

The smoke hissed in my ear. “Is that what you want? Is that what you want to live through again? He did it to you once, he’ll do it to you again.”

“Thora, listen to me.” Finn gripped my shoulders, shaking me out of the haze. “You have to fight it. Don’t let it pull you under, it’s going to lie to you.”

The smoke hissed in my ear once more. “Think about it.”

With that final word, the smoke cleared. The earthy, wet wood scent of the surrounding trees returned. Sun streamed through the leaves, painting the forest floor in dapples of green light, but I might as well have still been in the dark. I hugged my knees as pain washed over me and I swallowed the razor blades in my throat.

It felt exactly the same as it had the first time. Distance had numbed me some, I’d let myself forget how much it hurt. I almost gave in. I almost fell for him again.

“What did it show you?” Finn cupped my face, desperation making his eyes wild and unfocused. Tears ran down my face faster than he could swipe them away.

“It showed me the night we got in a fight about the internship.” I sucked in a shuddering breath, my emotions completely ravaged. “And it showed me everything that happened after. All the stuff with you and Olivia again.”

His eyebrows pinched together. “What are you talking about? What stuff with me and Olivia? There has never been stuff with me and Olivia.”

I let out a mean laugh as I hugged my knees tighter, folding in on myself, wanting to disappear altogether. “Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?” He fisted his hair, frustration hardening his features. “Make this make sense to me because I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Olivia told me the two of you hooked up a week after we broke up.”

“Bullshit.” He stood up so suddenly, I fell back. “That never happened. I never hooked up with Olivia, or any of those other girls you used to hang out with.”

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