Page 39 of Purity

“I don’t want to talk about the things he’s done. I mean we can talk about how you feel.”

I avert my gaze from hers. She’s done this a few times before, prompted me to share my feelings with her. How could she think I’d be that selfish and vent to her about my daddy issues when she’s the one most affected by his behavior?

“Every time I ask you how you’re feeling, you get so closed off. You say you’re fine, but I can see that you’re not. You were different after that trip to Arizona. Whatever you saw must have…” She shakes her head. “I wish I had gotten you counseling. I wish I had just made you go.”

“There was no way you could have made me, and he’s not worth counseling.”

She purses her lips primly, looking like she wants to roll her eyes. “I think the point is that you’re worth counseling. But what I’m trying to say is that I’m okay. You can talk to me. I’m not going to crumble. My priority is you and your brother and sister. If you ever want to talk, I’m here.”

She walks toward the door. After setting her hand on the knob, she turns to me. “I think you need to stay out of your dad’s way this weekend. No matter how angry you are with him, it’ll be hard for you to see him the way he is right now. He’s not himself.”

I wave a hand. “I’ll be fine.”

She sighs. “It would mean a lot to me if you promise to stay out of his way. Maybe get out of the house today. Go for a hike.”

“If it’ll make you feel better, I will.”

She smiles warmly before walking out the door. As soon as the sound of her footsteps fade, I leap up from the couch, running frantic hands through my hair as I head into my bedroom.

I need Livvy. She’ll be able to make sense of all this. After I make it to my bedside table and grab my phone, my hand freezes.

Fuck.

I’m not supposed to see her for three days. By my own request.

I pull up Zac’s name instead, and he picks up on the first ring. “If you’re calling instead of texting, something is wrong. What happened?”

I sigh heavily. “It’s a long story, and I don’t feel like going into it right now, but it involves my cheating asshole dad. As usual.”

“Aww shit, dude. Is your mom okay?”

“I don’t know. It’s always hard for me to tell with her, but my dad is not doing okay, which is…weird.”

“Aww man, I’m sorry. Do you want to come hang out?”

“Yeah, I need to get out of my house. Any chance you want to go for a hike?”

“Um…” He laughs softly. “I mean, I’m hungover as fuck, so no, but I will if you really want me to.”

“Yes, I do. Get your lazy ass out of bed. I’ll bring weed for your hangover.”

“Well, in that case… Actually, why don’t we invite Mari and Livvy? Livvy told me she wants to try weed for the first time.”

I grit my teeth. “I can’t invite Livvy. We have some…stuff we’re trying to figure out right now. With our friendship.”

“Yeah, Mari told me what she asked you to do.”

I roll my eyes. “Of course she did.”

“Why is this even an issue? I thought you’d jump at the opportunity. You’re obviously obsessed with her. You can’t bullshit me about this. I know you.”

I grit my teeth, not wanting to get into it with him. “My relationship with her is complicated.”

“If you say it is. Well, if you aren’t going to do it, Travis is trying to make a move. He told me he’s going to ask her to go to his parents’ church with him tomorrow.”

Heat breaks out over my skin. “What the fuck?”

“Calm down.” He sounds like he’s repressing laughter. “It’s the only in he has with her, and it’s a pretty low move. I’m not sure if God exists, but if he does, I think he’ll probably strike people down for using church to get pussy. Isn’t that blasphemy?”