Page 82 of Wild and Bright

Lauren

His eyes widen minutely, as if he was expecting me to argue with him. We stare at each other for several unending seconds.

He doesn’t trust me.

He doesn’t respect me.

I hold his stare, not wanting him to see how my heart is shattering, how the pain in my chest has grown so tight I can hardly breathe. I knew he’d be upset by my text, but I never anticipated this. I never understood the depth of his mistrust until this moment.

Oh God, why does this have to hurt so much? Why does it have to make me feel so small and worthless? He thinks I’m a child. A wild, reckless child, like the eighteen-year-old girl who dragged his brother into a laundry room and shattered any hope of a future between us. He’ll never let it go.

There’s no hope for us.

I’m pulled out of my head when Cam’s eyes drift to my right. A slight, humorless smile rises to his lips. “So I guess the no-champagne thing this morning was something you did for show?”

My stomach stirs with sickness. Was my stupid martini the culprit? Maybe he would have made the correct assumption if he hadn’t seen this drink. Maybe he would have guessed the real reason behind my evasive text…

But no.

It wouldn’t have mattered.

He’s predisposed to think the worst of me. Just like he was five years ago. Even after I begged him to believe that I wouldn’t have actually had sex with Hunter. That I was coming to my senses right before he found us. That I only dragged Hunter into that room in the first place because I was desolate and hurt. He didn’t believe me then, like he doesn’t believe me now. Because he doesn’t trust me, and it’s not fucking fair.

I glance down at my drink, and that familiar rage courses through my veins, that malicious thrill that makes my belly flip over with giddiness even in my despair.

What would he do if I picked up that drink and downed it in one gulp?

My stomach plummets.

I can’t do this anymore.

I stand up from my barstool and drift past him, willing my lips to stop quivering.

Don’t cry, Lauren. Wait until the airport, at least.

When we get into the car, Hunter is already snoring, and it’s a relief. I couldn’t bear it if he came to my defense right now. It would be too much. I’d lose this weak grip on my emotions and fully break down.

After slamming the driver’s side door, Cam hands me his phone. The United app is already up. “Don’t worry about the cost,” he says. “Just get the soonest flight you can. I want you to have plenty of time to pack.”

My throat constricts at the ice in his voice. I scroll through the app, instinct drawing my eyes to the most expensive flights. Childish Lauren would click on the one that’s over a thousand dollars more than all the others, probably because it leaves in an hour, but I refuse to do it. Instead, I reserve the one that leaves in the wee hours of the morning, even though the wait will be agony as I sit alone with my thoughts and my watery airport Bloody Mary. “You’re being irrational,” I say softly. “You’ll realize it in the morning.”

He doesn’t respond, but his hands clench over the steering wheel, his knuckles growing almost white. The sight of it is satisfying. He may look and sound cold, but a molten rage is brewing underneath the ice.

“Did you even think about Cadence?” I ask. “Tomorrow is my day with her. Ryder is set to drop her off at your house in the evening. I’m going to have to tell her that she won’t have her big room anymore. Without any warning.”

“Of course I thought about her,” he says, but I suspect he’s lying. He’s so myopic in his rage that all he sees is me. “And she’ll still have her room. We’re getting that DNA test. I won’t pay off your student loans if you don’t agree to get it done. You can try to call me out, say I’m breaking our agreement, but I consider what you did tonight infidelity. You lied to me. You took my alcoholic brother out to a bar.”

My lips quiver, and I hold my breath to keep the sob from coming out. It’s only when I feel the cold drop on my arm that I realize I already lost the battle.

“But if you get the DNA test, we’ll call it a day. We both know she’s mine. She looks more like me than Ryder. So we’ll get the test and confirm it, and moving forward, we’ll work out some kind of custody agreement. I’ll even support you from here on out, assuming you can prove to me that you can be responsible enough—”

“You’re out of your fucking mind if you think you can manipulate me like this.”

The car goes quiet. Even Hunter has stopped snoring.

The words feel like they came from outside of me. Even as they echo in my head, they sound like someone else. Rage has made the world around me buzz, the ambient road noise sharp and crisp.

“I’ll let you be a father to her. Like I said I would. But if you think you can use my student loans to get exactly what you want from me, think again. I’m not a stupid teenager anymore.”

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