Page 58 of Wild and Bright

This is what he does. When things get too intense, he puts up his guard.

I swallow before speaking, keeping my voice even with effort. “So I’m not going to brunch with you?”

“No,” he says, his voice notably softened. “It will only be Hunter, Isaac, and Janie and her husband. So three of my five people will be there. I won’t need you to talk to people so I won’t have to.”

Of course I wouldn’t go to brunch with him and the closest people in his life. Because this isn’t a real relationship.

Summoning every ounce of bravado I have, I throw the comforter open, exposing my bare body to the cold air. After hopping off the bed, I march to the bathroom. Cam’s head snaps in my direction as I walk through the door. When I plop down on the toilet, his eyebrows shoot to his forehead. His eyes snap to my hips at the sound of liquid falling into the toilet.

“You’re peeing in front me.” His voice has a faraway quality to it.

I smile cheekily. “Yep.”

Broken-hearted girls don’t pee in front of the boys who crushed their hopes.

He doesn’t say anything, but his eyes stay fixed on my hips. A smile rises to my lips.

“I pee in front of everyone. I have no boundaries. If it bothers you, I won’t do it. But most of my friends don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind.” His voice is hushed, and he looks almost mesmerized.

“Oh my God! Do you have, like, a thing for pee?”

His smile vanishes, his eyes growing wide.

“If you do, it’s totally fine. Not my kink, but I can work with it. I don’t think I could go beyond that though. If you have a poop thing, you’re going to have to contract out. But I won’t judge you.”

He continues to stare at me with wide eyes, and I nearly jump when he bursts into laughter. He lowers his head, his shoulders vibrating. “I can’t believe you,” he says in a strained voice. “You were really serious.”

I frown at him. “Forgive me for misunderstanding when you were staring at me while I peed. You looked like you were into it.”

He shakes his head, his shoulders still shaking with laughter. “You thought I had a defecation kink.” His voice is strangled. “And you were okay with it.”

“Yeah, I don’t kink shame.”

“I know you don’t.” He smiles down at me, his eyes hooded. After walking over to the toilet, he kneels in front of me and presses a hard kiss against my lips. When he pulls away, he raises his hand and strokes a strand of hair behind my ear. “I think you might be the least judgmental person I’ve ever met.”

I swallow, lowering my gaze. “That’s funny, because I’ve always thought you’re the most judgmental person I’ve ever met.”

He stiffens, but he doesn’t pull away. “I’m sorry.”

My heart starts to race. I take a deep breath in through my nose and release it slowly out of my mouth. “For what?”

When he doesn’t answer right away, my stomach sinks. I know what he’s going to say.

I just know.

“I can’t do this longer than six months. I can’t make this a real relationship.”

The air leaves my lungs as suddenly as if he hit me in the chest.

“I just can’t do it.” His eyes are pleading. “I already feel like my life is spiraling out of control. Like I’m losing a handle on…everything.”

“And that’s my fault?” My voice is small and tight.

He doesn’t respond, and that’s all the answer I need.

“You do this a lot, don’t you?” I ask.

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