Page 83 of Wild and Bright

His nostrils flare, his jaw clenching. “Tonight proves otherwise.”

The humorless laugh wrenched from my chest feels almost like a sob. “And what about you? What about you tracking my phone location without even telling me? I know that’s what you did. I know that’s how you knew where we were.”

His expression doesn’t change, though his jaw clenches.

“What in God’s name is wrong with you? Do you really hate me this much? Why has it not occurred to you that I showed up at the bar tonight because I was worried about him?”

“That explains your martini, doesn’t it?”

I flinch, but I refuse to cower. “Yeah, I shouldn’t have ordered that. I shouldn’t have let him manipulate me. I was pissed off and not thinking straight, but it still boggles my mind that you would think I came out here to party with him. What in my behavior these last few months would make you think I would do that?”

He opens his mouth but then closes it, and it feels like an eternity before he finally answers. “I saw him put his arms around you, and the way you—” His mouth snaps shut, but I can fill in the rest.

The way I leaned into his arms.

“Oh my God.” My voice grows breathless from rising hope. “Is this about the laundry room? Are you… Are you jealous of Hunter? Because you know I only did that to lash out at you. You have to know that, right? I was hurt, and I do stupid things when I’m hurt. It’s never been like that between Hunter and me. We’re almost like brother and sister. I mean, he did used to try to kiss me sometimes when he was drunk, and sometimes I’d let him just because—”

“Jesus Christ, stop talking!”

I flinch, realizing the euphoria of hope is making my tongue loose.

“Cam.” I try to adopt a reasonable tone. “If this is about jealousy, we can work through it. At first I thought you were blaming me for his relapse—”

“This isn’t about jealousy.” His tone is almost bored. “This is about the conditions of your employment. What you did tonight was a betrayal. Maybe not a physical betrayal, although…” He huffs out a humorless laugh, but it doesn’t sound right. It’s too brittle, almost like a cry. “Who knows with you?”

“You are jealous.” I grunt, turning away and shaking my head. “You’re acting like you caught me fucking him.”

I’m startled when he pulls off to the side of the road and slams on the breaks. He whips around to face me. “You mean caught you fucking him again, right? And if I hadn’t caught you guys tonight when I did, you would have fucked him. Just like you would have fucked him five years ago!”

He’s shouting now, and I welcome it. This is the rage that I knew was there all along, and it feels so much better than his icy contempt.

“I know you. I know you better than anyone. You may not have set out to fuck him, but you would have. If you had enough to drink. Or if you got a text from me that made you angry. Or if we got in a fight…” He looks away, his eyes growing unfocused. “Maybe not tonight, maybe not even him, but something like that would happen eventually…”

He looks so lost right now. His unseeing eyes are intently focused on the steering wheel. Impulsively, I reach out and touch his face. He flinches in surprise, but he doesn’t pull away.

“I love you,” I say.

His head snaps in my direction, his eyes wide and dazed. He looks like a trapped animal, not knowing which way to run. But then cynicism enters his eyes as he yanks away from my touch.

“You don’t have to worry about your two-hundred grand. I’ll give it to you either way. I’m not that much of a monster that I’d deprive the mother of my child of her income.”

“I didn’t say I love you because I’m worried about the money. I said it because I’m sick of being childish. I’m twenty-three years old, and I think I’m finally growing up.”

He grunts. “I’ll believe that when I see it.”

“You won’t see it, because I’ll be out of your life.”

An emotion flashes in his eyes. Something that almost looks like fear.

“And that’s for the best,” I say.

He clenches his jaw so tightly it looks like it might snap in two. “Glad you recognize that.”

I nod slowly. “I do. All my life I’ve craved respect and validation from people who withhold it from me—people like you and my mom. I resent it, and I haven’t dealt with that resentment very well. I’ve done some childish things, but I’m done with all that. I don’t need your respect or your trust. Not if you aren’t willing to give it to me freely. I won’t jump through hoops to earn it.” When I place a hand on his arm, he flinches. “Tomorrow, you’re going to realize what a stupid mistake you’ve made.”

His nostrils flare. “I won’t.”

“You will, and when you call me, I won’t answer.” I pull away from him, settling back into my seat. “Just go ahead and get me to the airport. My flight leaves in a few hours. I’d like to get at least some sleep.”

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