Page 11 of Sick of This Ship

“If you hate cruises so much, Anna, you sure must have a juicy reason to be on board.”

“I wouldn’t be here at all, if it wasn’t for my si—" I stop myself. I can’t let him get to me like that.

“She’s here for me,” Jamie interjects. “I love cruises.” Sebastian’s face darkens so fast I look up at the ceiling, expecting rain.

* * *

SEBASTIAN

Unreal. Jamie just admitted their relationship straight up. Jamie and Anna must have known Mike would cancel. This was their way of getting him to foot the bill, wasn’t it?

“What is it you love about cruises, Jamie?” I ask. “Or was it more the Love at Sea part you wanted?”

“What’s not to enjoy about this?” Jamie says, gesturing around the room. Anna rolls her eyes.

“So, Anna, is Jamie making all this dreadful cruising worthwhile? Or perhaps hisinputis what’s keeping you civil?” I ask.

“Nothing will change my mind about cruises, Sebastian. But also, I’m an adult who doesn’t need to constantly get her way,” Anna says.

“Come on, I bet Jamie gives you your way every day and every night.” Sebastian tilts his head. Oscar and his blonde buddy, Aniston, glance at each other with little grins.

“Oh, we’re all trying to make it a good time for Anna.” Oscar smirks while the guys titter.

“Is that so?” I give him a long cool stare, but he doesn’t break my gaze or stop with that self-satisfied little half-smile. His eyes sparkle.

“You should get in on it, man,” Jamie says, grinning. Has he no decency? “We’ll make it worth your while.”

“Absolutely not.” I throw my napkin on the table, about to push away. I’m getting close to crossing a line here. Mike is my client. I’m supposed to be hunting for information, for proof of infidelity. Not goading his wife, and definitely not joining her harem.

“Yaaas.” Jamie leans in and grabs my hand before I can move. “Come on.” His eyes flick to Anna’s face, then back to mine with a devious sparkle. “This will be fun. Let’s show our little love bug the best cruise of her life.”

Colin squeezes my knee, bringing my attention back to the fact that he’s had his hand there the whole time. Even if he is into Anna, he’s also into me. What am I getting into?

“Um…” I swallow, looking around the table at four men with expectant eyes. What if they’re all bi-sexual? I’m going to have to toe a fine line between flirting for information and getting groped.

“I am not okay with this plan.” Anna is the only person who looks as upset by the whole idea as I am. “I’m already fine. You don’t need to worry about me. I don’t need to be convinced to like cruise ships, and I don’t need Sebastian’s help to have fun. No offense.” The look she gives me isn’t apologetic.

My chest burns. Am I so horrible the woman who’s sleeping with all these dudes wouldn’t even consider me? I smack that thought shut like a book.

“Maybe you do need his help, honey.” Oscar raises his eyebrows at her.

“Yeah, you shot down almost every single suggestion we made about excursions this week. Maybe you need a little somethingextra?” Jamie still wears a devious smile. I refuse to be Anna’s variety.

“I need nothingextra, Jamie.” Anna crosses her arms, growling.

“How about this? If you try to have fun, we promise you won’t have to languish on the ship all week, resting,” Jamie says. “We’ll find a real adventure to get you off the ship at every port, and we’ll make sure you won’t have to use your ankle. Isn’t that a good deal?”

“It’ll be fun!” Oscar says. Nods go around the table, but Anna frowns at Jamie.

Meanwhile, around the restaurant, the crowd cheers and claps, cutting off our conversation. People stare towards the red stage at the back wall, where two tall, lithe ladies with cotton candy wigs, glittering dresses, and bold make-up gyrate into the spotlight. The house lights dim.

“Hello, lovers,” says the performer wearing a lavender wig. “We’re the Booby Traps, and I promise, the goods are real.” Both of them adjust their bust lines and the crowd laughs.

“Who wants to come up and check?” asks the performer in a pink wig. Hands shoot up around the room.

“Don’t you believe me?” asks the lavender lady. “I solemnly swear to tell you the truth, the whole truth, or something like the truth, so help me, RuPaul.”

“If you still want to squeeze some titties, though, you could always ask the person beside you.” The pink one adjusts her wig. “Come on, don’t be shy, this is the Love at Sea cruise! If you haven’t squeezed them already, you will soon!” More laughter.

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