Page 36 of Doctor Daddy

“I’m so old. So old.”

We made arrangements for a Saturday afternoon show. That would work because I could then have dinner and spend the evening with Mark.

I texted him next. “Hey, change of plan, I’m in bed, and I’m staying here until tomorrow morning. Don’t be mad at me.”

“Don’t worry, why would I be mad?”

“It feels like everyone is mad at me today.” It wasn’t everyone, but that one patient had ruined my entire day, and it felt like everyone was judging me.

“You rest. I’ll see you on Saturday.”

I fell asleep shortly after that. I managed to get up and change out of my work clothes, but only after I had already been asleep for a few hours.

The next morning felt very much like the one before. My alarm went off too early, my mother was too talkative as I got my coffee, and I made stupid mistakes at work. At least it was Friday. I had a weekend to look forward to. Movies with Angela, and a night in Mark’s arms.

I went to bed early again. It was a habit that I was rapidly beginning to enjoy indulging in.

“When was the last time you got some sleep?” Angela asked as I met her at the theater.

“That’s a nice hello.”

“No, seriously Brooke, those bags under your eyes look like you’re packing for a European vacation.”

I touched my face and scoffed. “They aren’t that bad. This is what I get for not wearing makeup.”

“This guy you’re seeing on the side, he isn’t making you do anything, you know, like drugs?”

I laughed. “No, he’s not into drugs. You don’t have to worry. I’m just trying to do it all and learning that maybe I can’t. I don’t get it. I’m only twenty-four. I could stay up all night in college and still function the next day.”

“Could you really? Or did you manage to just get your body to classes? There is a difference between having your body present at a lecture and having to actually function. I swear working is harder than school ever was, and that includes all the research papers.”

“I hear you loud and clear.”

I ordered a large popcorn at the concession counter, and we headed into the movie. As I sat there in the dark shoveling handfuls of popcorn in my mouth, I thought about what she said. Sitting in the theater wasn’t difficult. I didn’t need to be alert. And I certainly didn’t need to be dressed a certain way or have makeup on. It was no different than sitting in a lecture hall. And both were very different from work, where I had to be alert and functional. And my dates with Mark, well, I did want to make sure he saw me in a certain way, so I was always alert with my makeup on.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized I wasn’t giving myself any downtime. I was switched on and functioning all the time. It was exhausting. No wonder I was feeling worn out.

My stomach rumbled uncomfortably about halfway through the movie. I set the popcorn bucket down and stopped frantically filling my face.

“That was fun. You want to get a late lunch?”

The movie had been fun, but at the mention of food, my stomach suddenly lurched.

I barely had time to look at Angela in confusion before I had to run for the bathroom. I made it and didn’t embarrass myself in public by having to throw up in a trash can.

“Brooke, are you okay?” She stood outside the stall as I continued to regurgitate all the popcorn I had ever eaten.

I flushed the toilet and wiped my mouth. “I don’t think food is a good idea.”

I washed up and rinsed my mouth out at the sink.

Angela put her hand on my forehead and cheek. “You don’t feel warm. You think you can drive home, or do you want me to drive?”

I felt a little wobbly. “Maybe you should drive me home.”

I texted Mark on the ride home, canceling our date for the evening. All I wanted was to go to bed.

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