Page 29 of Rescued

19

CAIMBRIE

Shortly after takeoff, the ship’s ascent smoothed out and we glided through space effortlessly. At least, it felt that way from where I was sitting in my bunk. But I was already growing bored back there on my own. Herod and I hadn’t shared many deep conversations in our time together, but I was still used to having his presence nearby. Sitting alone, I missed the lazy chatter that passed between us as he piloted the ship or saw something strange on his view panel.

But I wasn’t just bored. I was also lonely, a feeling I had not yet come to grips with since I’d been freed from my chains. Aboard the Patrol ship, I was always lonely, but I was always too scared of what they might do to us to even think about it. Now, though, I knew how much I needed another person close to me.

When Herod woke me getting out of bed, it was like the weight of a thousand bricks was pressing in on me all the sudden. Just that small, unimportant action had been enough to awaken this roaring void inside of me. Loneliness too great to fill with a single encounter.

I pulled myself out of bed and began pacing the narrow room, one wall to the next, running my hands along the walls as I went. Every bump and scuff helped ground me, bringing me back to myself. But soon the bunk area was too small, too, and I needed to go into the hallway to change the scenery. I knew I was risking another confrontation with Nikathy, but my mood had changed from docile to indignant. How dare he come here and challenge me? Once upon a time, I had been someone. Someone with prestige and honor. That was a long time ago now, but that part of me was still alive somewhere deep down, and I wasn’t going to let anyone take it from me ever again.

I slid the dividing door open and marched out into the hallway, mumbling to myself. But as I approached the end of the hall where it opened into the cockpit, I froze.

There was a man on the video panel. The man who had been there when I was rescued. Adreax, it must be. Of course.

I listened to the conversation, pressed up against the wall, preparing to hear my fate. How long would it be before I was whisked away to this new reality I was being promised? Two days? Three at most? And what did that mean for Herod and I?

I was so caught up in the dizzying implications for our short-lived relationship that I almost didn’t catch the comment Nikathy made after. However, I did catch Herod’s denial, strong and sure.

It was like an icy blast of water, solidifying my loneliness at once and freezing the breath in my lungs.

What had he said to Adreax before that?

“Just ready to be on my way.”

On his way. Away from me. Was he really that eager to be rid of me? Still? Yes. He was. I could hear it in his voice.

I crawled into my bunk, pulling the blanket up over my head and curling it around my fist. I bit down on the blanket wrapped around my hand to stifle an angry sob, releasing it only enough to gulp in big breaths. I raged in the tiny space until all of the anger and hurt had subsided, and then I turned inward.

This was fine. He was right. We had nothing in common. If anything, I was the one who had been using him. Fulfilling some bad boy fantasy of my own. Neither of us had committed to anything, and now it was time to let it go.

This version of the story I was telling myself felt more natural. So what if we’d had a passionate night of kissing and touching together? We’d gotten it out of our systems, and now we were both headed in our own directions. I had to accept that.

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