He wears an American Eagle T-shirt and shorts that go past his knees. His hair falls over his face and covers his eyes. A blue wristwatch sits on his left wrist and his puffy shoes rise to his ankles. A flurry of freckles dots his nose and his red lips are pursed.
I never realized how much Miles looked like his Dad, but I can't unsee it now. He's Grant's mini-me, the version that's lost to the past.
"Miles." Excitement over this unexpected reunion lifts me out of my bad mood. "What are you doing here?"
Miles smiles. "Hey, Ollie. I heard you were back in town."
"Did your dad tell you?" A laugh escapes me. "I can't believe you're really here. It's been way too long. Thanks for swinging by."
Miles pulls a package out of his backpack. "I brought you something." He tears off the plastic wrap and points inside. "Rainbow sprinkle cupcakes. I remember how much you liked them as a boy. My mom told me to buy some."
I take the package and run my thumb over it. "This is so kind. You didn't have to do this."
I completely forgot about my childhood fascination with rainbow sprinkle cupcakes. During sleepovers, Miles would purchase cupcake mix from the grocery store for us. We created all sorts of cupcakes, from carrot cake to red velvet, from peanut butter cup to chocolate fudge. But my favorite were rainbow sprinkle. Dusting the top with multicolored flecks of candy made me feel so Little.
The best part was when Grant crept into the kitchen for a midnight snack. He'd catch us whipping up the batter, spilling frosting everywhere. He'd pretend to lecture us, but the mirth in his eyes let me know he enjoyed it. When we finished our cupcakes, we always brought him one to judge.
"You've been gone for a long time." Miles follows me inside my apartment. "No one knew what happened to you. Where were you?"
After I set the cupcakes on the table, I shove my hands in my pockets. "I can't say."
"That's okay. You don't need to tell me."
"A lot's happened in the past seven years." I bite my cheek. "So damn much has changed."
"You can say that again." Miles nods. "You probably don't know this, but my Dad went crazy looking for you. My Mom and I thought you were dead, but he never gave up searching. Was he the one who found you?"
I shake my head. "I managed to leave the bad situation I was in by myself."
"Have you visited my dad?"
I smile. "Yes. He made me hot chocolate just like he used to. I saw your old bedroom. Oh my Gosh, Miles." I rest my chin on my fist. "The memories that flooded my brain were nuts. We had so many great times in your dad's house. Sleepovers. Cops and robbers. He told me about your next-door neighbors, which awakened more memories. One of them has cancer, which is so sad. I was grateful they allowed us to play in their yard as boys. You, your dad, and your neighbors made my childhood amazing."
Miles reclines on my couch. "I also heard about Charlie's cancer. I have to say, it crushed me."
"It must've been tough."
"Jacob and Charlie are such nice people. They don't deserve to go through that shit. When I get to heaven, I'll have a talk with God and ask him why he does cruel things to good people. Out of all the people in the world, he had to hurt Charlie."
I stare at my friend again. Gosh, it's been so long since I've seen him. He's grown up, but his outlook on life hasn't changed. He's still the deep thinker I knew.
"I need to apologize to you," I confess at last.
Miles ticks his head up. "Why?"
"At our sleepovers, I sometimes pushed the limits with you." Embarrassment turns my cheeks pink. "We played truth or dare and I always tried to see your dick. I felt terrible about that. You obviously weren't experiencing the same feelings as me. I should've read the room."
Miles flashes me a grin. "We were kids, Ollie. Kids do stupid things with each other and it doesn't mean anything serious."
I exhale a breath of relief. "So you're not upset with me?"
"Hell no." Miles chuckles. "You were my best friend. My buddy. The brother I never had. Yeah, I was straight, and I probably would've preferred to get naked with a girl if I'd had that option. But there's nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone's figuring out who they are at that age and experimenting with your friends is a natural part of growing up."
My eyes lock on Miles again. He's more muscular than I remember, his biceps bulging and toned. He looks like he hits the gym after school every day, spending a decent time pumping iron. Good Lord, I can't shake the sensation that he looks exactly like Grant.
He's a younger prototype of the man I've been in love with my entire life. If Grant were thirty years younger, he'd look identical to Miles. There's no doubt about it. I wonder if Grant worked out as much as Miles when he was young or if he didn't start hitting the gym until he was older. I close my eyes and picture Grant as a young man, meeting Linda, sweeping her off her feet. If he was anything like Miles, I bet he didn't need to work hard. He probably just looked at her and she toppled over.
I head to the fridge to retrieve two cans of soda. "I have lemon—"