Page 57 of The Lost Siren

“I fucked it up, as usual. Icouldn’tstay away from her. I had to watch from a distance at first, to make sure she was there. Then the temptation grew too strong. I wasn’t strong enough. I’m still not.”

My muscles tensed, warning bells going off in my head. Adrenaline flooded my body, and I was able to ignore the pain enough to stand. More than the news that he not only knew she was alive, butwhere, my mind latched onto a small, more singular detail.

“You said you’re protecting the lostsiren. Not the lost female, not the lost daughter, thesiren.” My voice trembled, even as the wind and rain pounded my body. Benedict took a steadying breath.

“Siren isn’t a real species; it’s just a myth given to the females who often defended the shores of Lyoness. It’s a silly human moniker, a pet name if you will—"

My heart froze.

“It’s your pet name forme.”

He didn’t deny it, just stared at me with that hooded gaze of his.

“Say it,” I challenged, starting to lose my grip on reality and consciousness. Benedict’s eyes were everywhere but me, and that was telling.

“What do you want me to say? That I’ve watched her die thirty-nine mortal deaths because I’m a GODDAMN COWARD?”

Siren. It was always that word, wasn’t it?

“You’re thelastmale on earth I’d call a coward. Prove it by telling mewhy you call me siren when she’s still out there.”

He closed the space between us in seconds, my short dagger still gripped in his hand. His body leaned against me even as he dropped it to the ground. We both fell to our knees, the raining soaking our skin.

“I’d ratherdiethan break the protections on her.”

And that was it, wasn’t it? It didn’t matter what I did for him, or what I sacrificed. He’d always be in love with this mythical girl, wouldn’t he? He pushed the dagger between our chests, my sobs threatening to overcome me as my fingers joined his on the hilt. His wordsburnedin my blood, because for whatever fucked up reason, IlovedBenedict. I loved him just as much as I loved Kieran and Ronan, even though it hurt. Even though it was like trying to love the darkest depths of the ocean, an endless expanse of black and nothingness that would only suffocate you in the end. Benedict’s eyes glowed in the darkness of the storm.

“Ihateyou. Iloveher.”

It would be easy to push my dagger forward; easy to stop the hurtful words from spewing out of his mouth. But my life had never been easy, had it? I closed my eyes and relaxed my grip.

“As long as you’re alive and she’s alive, there’s always hope.”

Benedict shook his head, sending droplets of rain scattering around him.

“I only know one more way to keep her safe forever, and after I do it, no one will ever claim her. I’m acoward,Wren. Most days I wished I had died with my father, withhonor. Not reduced to trapping my own people in a prison,lyingto death to keep us alive, and for what purpose?”

Benedict’s hands grasped mine around the dagger’s hilt, and for a moment, I was just happy to be this close to him. I never realized how badly I’d wanted him to be happy and content untilright now, and his pain might be enough to break me.

“Could you ever love me?” I whispered, my heart sinking into my feet. Our foreheads touched, and I knew something terrible was about to happen. His gaze pierced my soul as he caressed my cheek, a look of yearning so raw it stole my breath, preserving it forever as it hung in the space of this specific, fleeting moment. The rain continued to pound around us.

“Not while you look like this, siren.”

He’d said that to me once before, one of my first nights here. What did itmean?

With a jerk he plunged my dagger deep into his own chest, my fingers still entwined with his around the hilt. I screamed as we both fell to the ground, blood leaving his body in raging torrents as I fell on top of him. He refused to move his hand and the dagger enclosed in it, and my scream didn’t end; it modulated higher and higher, warping into the high keen of a raging distress call, because it was so fucking obvious now even as I spat at the storm and howled my defiance to a hunk of stone that didn’t care. Rage and magick exploded around me, my pain only secondary to the sudden realization that changed everything.

I was the lost siren, and Benedict was trying to die to keep it a secret.

Another animalistic shriek left my throat, pain exploding throughout my body as scales erupted from my back with a vicious ripping sound, dotting my body with an iridescent, white color. With an inhuman cry two wings shot from my shoulders, dripping blood and mucus. I went blind, then everything came back into focus in astonishing detail, from the scales on Benedict’s chest to the blood pumping over the ground he laid on. Claws shot out of my nail beds, black and sharp and foaming with a deadly poison.

Benedict stayed sprawled on the ground, breathing heavily but with a stupid, victorious smirk on his face. He pulled the dagger out with a wince and pulled me to him, and for only the second time I could recallkissedme. I forgot to breathe, not able to tell where the air began, and his kiss ended. After the most blissful few minutes of my life, he pulled away.

“Tricked you.”

His fangs drifted to my neck and bit down, his chest healing over as he greedily lapped at my blood. I growled and pulled him harder to me as he drank, until I felt a pull in my heartbeat, and I tore myself away. His chest sported a nasty scar to match the ones on my face. Kieran’s words floated back to me, and I felt incredibly foolish.

“A knife directly to his heart won’t kill him, unless he wishes to die.”

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