Page 86 of Filthy Rock Stars

I chuckle. “Sure. That easy.”

Nico shrugs. “Hey. Maybe I’ll make enough money to pay all your legal bills. We don’t need to be a double-income rock-star family, do we?”

A swell of emotions surprises me, inadequacy like I feel when I want to tell him that I love him. I force a laugh to cover it, but it sounds as awkward as I feel.

“Sorry! Is that weird? Should I not joke about us being a family?”

“No. You’re fine.” I manage a smile. “I guess, when I was a kid, I always figured I’d grow up and not amount to much. Deadbeat and depending on my boyfriend before thirty does the trick.”

“Shadow,” he says. “That’s not what I said.”

I shake my head. “I know. You’re being sweet. Thank you.” I give him a quick kiss, not wanting my gloomy ass to bring him down twice in one day, but I’m suddenly doubting myself, and I know he can see the trouble in my expression.

“You want your own money, though,” he says. “That I do understand. It’s always been important to me that I can support myself.”

“It’s not even the money. Not really. I swear I’m not pulling some macho bullshit about needing to be the breadwinner or whatever.” I shake my head. “I know that’s not what you meant, either.”

He tilts his head to the side. “Then what it is?”

I search for a way to explain, but I come up short. Maybe this is what love does, but my emotions feel scraped raw, harder to hide from.

It’s all so complicated, my family and the band and everything, I don’t know how to explain why I feel this way.

Then it hits me. Maybe I don’t have to explain after all.

CHAPTERTWENTY-SEVEN

NICO

“Hold on a second,your parents are Ronald and Rhonda, and your legal name is Ronnie Junior?”

Shadow grunts. We’re parked just outside his hometown, a quiet spot off the highway. Green hills roll into the distance, and behind us, the mountains rise tall.

“No,” he says with a frown, eyes toward the town. “My legal namewasRonald Junior. But I changed it when I turned eighteen.”

“To Shadow?”

He pushes a hand through his hair. “I started calling myself that in high school, back when I joined the band. We all picked fake names, but I was the only one who used it full-time. Mainly to piss my parents off. I changed it at the courthouse, I guess as an act of teenage rebellion or some shit. And it worked. They were mad as hell. But when the band got big, suddenly, they embraced it. Like they were proud of me. Proud of Shadow.”

His voice is strained. Shadow seemed so relaxed when he invited me on this trip, but the closer we get to arrival, the more I can feel his pain.

He’s showing me something by bringing me here. I’m not sure what that is, but I know it’s important to him, so I do my best to listen.

I slip my hand into his. “I like your name,” I tell him. “I like that you chose it for yourself.”

He cocks up half a smile. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” I grin. “It’s very you.”

He laughs. “I guess we’ll see if that’s a good thing.”

“It is,” I assure him, aware he’s acting more sardonic than usual. “Now let’s hope this routine works with your parents. Claiming I’m your assistant makes sense, but do you really think your sunglasses and scarf costume will work?” I stick my hip to the side. “I’m famous now, too,” I point out.

Shadow snorts air out his nose. “Trust me. Sunglasses and a fashion scarf have worked for celebrities for years. Plus, my parents are self-obsessed. They don’t give the people who work for me much attention.” He catches my eye. “You sure you don’t mind going undercover?”

“Hey, it takes the anxiety out of impressing the parents, right? I kind of get to meet them without having to really meet them.”

He brushes a kiss across my lips. “Always the optimist. We’ll start out with my mom, hit up my old man if we have the energy left. Either place, we’ll split before any more company shows up. An hour, tops.”

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