Page 101 of Filthy Rock Stars

He must be a hundred feet away, but I can feel his heartbeat.

Without another thought, I open my mouth, and I start to sing. “Doo doo, doo doo duh doo doo,” I hum out awkwardly.

It’s “Lovefool.”

Fuck. I’m singing “Lovefool.”

The song he used to dance to as a kid, his cheesy childhood favorite.

And since I don’t know what else to do, I lock my eyes on Nico, and I keep singing. I strum my guitar and start walking across the stage as a confused murmur goes through the crowd. I should know the words—I’ve listened to it enough times since he mentioned loving the song—but instead I’m just garbling nonsense about problems and need until I hit the chorus again and sing loud and clear.

Standing alone at the edge of the stage, I belt the words, thrashing my guitar as I beg Nico to love me, repeating the infectious lyrics over and over. The cameras are all repositioned, locked on me as I perform a blistering solo to an audience of one, my eyes burning into his.

I fall to my knees, shredding the song because the only thing I can do now is throw myself into it and beg Nico for forgiveness, the rest of the world be damned.

Sweat pours down my chest, and right when I think I’ve really gone and lost it, totally humiliated myself, Nico jumps up. He crawls onto the stage as people across the audience stand, craning their necks to see, and then he grabs the microphone and joins me.

Grinning wide, he sings the lyrics with me. His gorgeous voice elevates my off-key crooning, and every time Nico swears that he loves me and I’m the only one he cares about, another tidal wave of joy crashes down.

We’re laughing and singing, stomping our feet and rubbing shoulders, as good a duet as there’s ever been. Someone materializes his keytar from backstage, and Nico and I erupt into a proper performance, a totally unique, raucous, liberating cover of the old song.

When we hit the final note, we’re both gasping for breath. I don’t wait a moment. I grab his face and pull him to me. I take Nico in a deep, long kiss, our tongues thrusting together as the world watches and a shocked cheer erupts in the theater.

Our lips smack as I pull back. “I love you, Nico,” I tell him, my voice echoing in the microphone. I grab the mic and pull it to my mouth, turning to face my stunned band. “And I quit Forbidden Destiny,” I add. “Bullies like you are losers, and I’ve found something better.”

Elle is shocked, and beside her, Adrian looks furious. Enraged and insulted and with an ugly twist to his expression as the applause of the theater makes it clear that we’ve won.

Without another thought, I grab Nico’s hand and lead him offstage. It’s total chaos everywhere, everyone trying to talk to us. My heart is pounding, and my hands are shaking, and fuck, I can’t believe what I just did.

But when I pull Nico through the backstage crowd and into one of the tiny dressing rooms, everything goes still again. The noise disappears, the world stops spinning, and there’s just us.

Nico beams. “I love you, too, Shadow.”

CHAPTERTHIRTY-TWO

NICO

We’re in love.

The thought fills me, like a hot spring erupting. Shadow and I are in love, and we just told the entire world.

“I can’t believe you did that,” I tell him. “You just quit the band and came out on global television.”

He pushes his shaggy hair back. “And I told you that I love you,” he adds with a smile that’s almost shy, even after everything he just did. “Plus, I did it all with that Cardigans song.”

I laugh. “Did you plan that?”

“No. I don’t know. I guess it was stuck in my head.”

I laugh again, draping my hands on his shoulders. The dressing room is tiny, just big enough for a seat, a vanity, and some clothes, and I can hear people gathering on the other side of the door.

He shakes his head and then presses his forehead to mine. “I don’t know why it took me so damn long. I’m sorry.”

“No,” I try to assure him. “I understand. You just sacrificed so much, Shadow. You’re risking your fortune, your music career, your family. Everything.”

“And I should have done it earlier,” he says again, his voice firm. “I hurt you because I wasn’t strong enough, but I promise, Nico. If you’ll let me, I’ll never let you down again. No more secrets. No more compromises. Just us.”

I press my lips to his. It feels so good to hear those words, even though the pain in Shadow’s voice makes my chest ache.

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