Page 70 of Filthy Rock Stars

“And you’ve played the arena before,” he says, thinking it out, “so you have firsthand knowledge. I’m sure the schematics for the building are available online. Municipal databases, maybe. There’s a possibility Forbidden Destiny fans would recognize me, but that’s not insurmountable.”

I rub his thigh. “Do you have any idea how sexy your brain is?”

He laughs and pushes his hand over mine, easing back against me. “This probably says more about my cock than my brain,” he jokes.

“Either way, you’re making Los Angeles sound much more exciting,” I flirt. “And there’s always the hotel for backup if needed.”

Nico is totally hard now, his thick cock at full attention. “Secretly hooking up in public gets a lot more complicated when you’re both famous, huh?”

I keep my hand on his thigh. I’m tempted to pull him to the bed and give him another orgasm. This talk is only fantasy, but it’s turning him on, and that’s turning me on, and a part of me wonders if Nico really would meet me in the back of the arena if I invited him.

Before I can whisper something dirty in his ear, though, he turns and pushes himself up, facing me. His nose is wrinkled, his brow creased in thought.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Sorry. It’s just… What are we doing here?”

I stroke the side of his face. “Big question. How do you mean?”

“This started off all about my kink. Purely sexual. And now it’s so much more, but when I think about it, when I think about us, I realize I still don’t know what we’re doing.” He swallows. “I don’t know what you’re looking for.”

“Oh.” I sit up, too, and take a drink of water from the glass on the tray. “This is one of those relationship talks I’ve heard so much about it, isn’t it?”

He gives me a lopsided smile. “I guess it is. Is that okay? I know we still have a million other obstacles to navigate.”

“Yeah, totally okay,” I tell him because Nico wants this, and when Nico wants something, that’s pretty much all that matters, as far as I’m concerned. “I just, uh, have never done one of these before.”

“Really?”

“There’s no relationship talk when the sex comes with a nondisclosure agreement.”

“I suppose that’s why I’m a little nervous to ask. You want something different…” He takes a second, his voice faltering, then speaks clearly. “With me?”

“Yeah,” I admit. “I do. You’re different.”

“How?”

“Because you’re Nico,” I tell him, trying to find a way to explain it. “Compartmentalizing sex is easy. My hookups were discreet, and considering I’m not out to my family or the world, it never crossed my mind to look for something more. But then you showed up, and I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about you. So yeah, I do want something more. I just have no fucking clue what that means, either.”

Nico sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, smiling.

“What?” I ask with a chuckle.

“Sorry. You’re just cute when you’re flustered.”

I snort. “Whatever,” I say but I’m smiling, too.

“It’s okay to not know exactly what you want,” Nico says, straightening his back. “But I do know what I want.”

“And what’s that?”

“Commitment. Monogamy. I’m not sure about kids, but I do see myself with a partner.” He swallows. “I want a man I can build a life with.”

My brain latches on that word,monogamy. I’ve never done that before, but the realization that we haven’t clarified our commitment and that Nico could, theoretically, hook up with someone else terrifies me.

“Fuck. Monogamous. Yes. We’re that.”

He laughs. “Really?”

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