Page 84 of Home Sweet Home

Della chuckled, her glasses sliding down the bridge of her nose. “I watched you press your face to your kitchen window about fifty times. I figured at some point you’d find your way over here.” She tilted her head toward West’s room. “He’s in there.”

Evie nodded, swiveling her head to look at his bedroom door before turning back to Della, who was still looking at Evie.

“You know,” Della said, glancing out the window toward Evie’s backyard. “I remember the day your mom moved into that house. She was so damn determined to do it all.”

Evie could still remember her mom coming home from Joe’s, exhausted and spent, peeling off her shoes slowly, but with a smile for Evie and Josh. “She worked hard.”

“She set a good example that way,” Della said. “And she set a bad example in others. You know why I made West drive you to school?”

Evie shook her head.

“Your mom used to mention how much you hated the bus, how she couldn’t drive you because of her early shifts. West had the Jeep. He lived ten feet away from you. He was going to the same damn place. I brought up him driving you at least a dozen times. She’d wave her hand and say she didn’t want to put us out.” Della sighed. “When it came to your mom, I needed to insist. So that’s what I did. You come by it honestly. And breaking patterns we’ve inherited from our parents is hard.”

There was a weight to Della’s words. She wasn’t just talking about Evie. She was talking about West.

“I hope you know,” Della said. “I didn’t realize how bad it was with his dad. He never hit him or hurt him. I just thought he was hard on West. And to be honest, he could be the same way with me. It felt like our normal. If I knew what it really did to him, I wish I could say I would have made different decisions. But I left my job when I married him. Spent my life raising West. I don’t regret that one bit. But the thought of starting over, doing it on my own, that was terrifying. It’s one thing I always admired about your mom. And I hope you won’t judge me too harshly for it.”

“I know what it’s like to not have any good choices,” Evie said. “You did the best you could. And West loves you.”

She patted Evie’s hand. “I know. Now off you go.”

Each step to West’s room felt as hard as the ones outside, but after a few seconds she was standing there, her knuckles hovering an inch away from the wood. She took one big deep breath and rapped her hand against the wood three times. Her hand was coming down a fourth time when the door swung open, then she was standing face-to-face with West.

Seeing him knocked all the air out of her for a solid five seconds. She could tell by the dark circles under his eyes that he hadn’t slept, and it gave her a pang of hope that maybe he was as torn up as she was. He’d just showered. His golden waves were almost brown from the water. The scent of pine and mint came off his skin. She’d smelled it on him a few times since he’d been back in town, and she only now realized it was probably the soap he used. It was intoxicating.

“Hi,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Hi,” Evie said. He might have been hurting, or maybe he was just angry, but he was still so beautiful, it made her heart ache.Did I mess up the only good thing that has ever really happened to me?“Can I come in?”

West didn’t say anything, but he nodded and moved aside to make room for her. As she passed by him, she felt the urge to bury her face in his chest and feel his arms wrapped around her, but she resisted it, instead carefully perching on the edge of his bed.

Evie glanced up at the wall, where Morgan Madison looked down on her. The first time she’d truly spent time with West when he came back, she’d been sitting in the exact same spot. The thought was almost enough to bring a smile to her face, how differently she felt about him now compared to then, but the warmth quickly faded, replaced with anxiety that she would never feel that way again.

To her surprise, West didn’t sit in the chair at his desk. He sat next to her, leaving just a few inches of space between them, close enough that she could have reached over and put her hand over his. It felt like her brain was short-circuiting with him so close. Her mind swirled with all the things she wanted to say, and though the words were there, she couldn’t grasp any of them.

After a few seconds, she blurted out the only tangible sentence she could find. “I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m really sorry, West. I shouldn’t have said so many of the things that I said. And I shouldn’t have been so angry about the money.”

West sighed. “No, you shouldn’t have been. But I know you, Evie, and I know why you were. And it wasn’t fair of me to say all that stuff about how you won’t move on and do new things, because I know your life has been very different from mine.” He shook his head. “Been beating myself up about that since you handed me that check. But I hope you know, I only said it because more than anything, I want you to be happy. And I know that being a waitress isn’t what makes you happy. Not because it’s not a fine job, but because it’s not what you love.”

“I know.” Evie took a deep breath to recover from the wordlovecoming out of West’s mouth. “But you were right about it. I’ve spent so much time just trying to survive each day that I never really had to think about the future. And then you came back, and that changed in so many ways, and I think… I think it really scared me. You really scared me.”

West moved his body to press up against hers, wrapping his arm around her in a little cocoon. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I didn’t mean you actually scared me,” Evie said. “More like the idea of you scared me. I think I’ve known for a while now that I had… feelings for you. I’ve never felt that way about anyone before, maybe because I haven’t met the right person or maybe because I never let myself feel that way. Doesn’t matter why. All that matters is that once I felt it, I knew that if I lost that, it would hurt, and I didn’t know if I could handle it.”

“I understand, Peach.” His thumb traced a circle on her arm. It was so much like how he’d been with her after that night on the boat, tender and unhurried, and it made her breaths deepen, the knot in her chest loosening. “And I hope you’ve already figured this out, but I have feelings for you too. Every day of the past month has been better than maybe the last decade of my life. And it’s not because of the boys or being home or Della’s ribs, though they’re definitely a close second. It’s from making you laugh, even when I know you’re trying your very best not to. It’s seeing your face scrunch up when you’re pretending I did something to piss you off.”

Then he bent his head down to press his lips against the soft skin behind her ear, so quickly she didn’t have time to think, only to react. Her eyes pressed shut, and her lips parted, letting a soft exhale escape.

“And that look on your face when I kiss you in that spot is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my whole goddamn life.”

He’d pulled away, but it took her a few moments to collect herself and open her eyes. When she got up the courage to meet his gaze, he was staring at her so intensely that her heart started working so fast she was worried it would thump its way out of her chest. She had to remind herself to breathe every few seconds, because she kept forgetting. She felt like a turtle on its back, underbelly exposed to anyone and anything that came along. Evie fought the urge to pull her shell around her. Inside the hard exterior, at least, she was safe.

“I think I’m starting to fall in love with you.” The word slipped out before she could stop it. She hadn’t even thought about it, but the second she spoke it into existence, she knew it was true. “And I don’t want you to go back to LA. I really don’t. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you because I was worried you still would, but I’m telling you now. I don’t want you to go back. I want you to stay here with me. And if you don’t, I’ll understand. It’ll suck so bad, but I really will understand. But I don’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering what might have happened if I had only been brave enough to ask.”

The next ten seconds were the longest of Evie’s life. Then West reached for her, resting his hand on her bare knee. The warmth and weight were like a blanket, a smile pulling at the right corner of his mouth.

“I’m not going back,” he said, so quietly, she wondered if she’d imagined it.

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