Page 8 of The Soldier's Homecoming

“I love what I do, Daniel, but this whole stop-loss thing seems so unfair.” Penny rubbed at her temple, tired from thinking about the whole thing. “I’ll never forget that the army paid for my last three years of college, but I’ve done my time.”

“I know.”

She sighed and tried to relax. There was no point going over and over it again. They were entitled to extend her enlistment contract to retain her, end of story. Once this tour was over, she’d be home free, so she had to tough it out.

“Let’s forget my problem,” she said, pleased to change the topic. “How’s your job going?”

Daniel shrugged. “It’s fine, but it’s not the same.”

Penny leaned forward slightly, waiting to hear,wantingto hear what he had to say. Because even though their marriage was in tatters, and being near him, touching him, hurt, she still cared.

“I’m doing contract work for the navy still, and it cuts me up sometimes to see the boys going off for work. Seeing them all together, doing their thing, watching the other naval aviators heading out is tough.”

“While you’re stuck on the ground working on the choppers,” she finished for him.

“Yeah,” he said. “While I’m tinkering with them to get them running properly, and they’re out in the Seahawks.”

She didn’t miss the almost bitter edge to his voice.

They sat in silence, not looking at one another, yet not ready to stop talking either. To get up and walk away.

“Not that I’m complaining,” he quickly corrected himself.

“It’s just, I don’t know, different.”

“It’s what we always planned, though, right?” she asked, knowing they were both thinking it.

Him in the navy serving out his eight-year term, her finishing her degree through the army scholarship program then serving for four years. Only she’d never expected to be deployed overseas, let alone retained beyond her specified term.

“Me as a helicopter mechanic and you as a physio with your own practice. The house with the big backyard, maybe even another little one on the way.”

His words seeped through her body. It was the picture-perfect description she’d always imagined. What they’d always talked about.

Penny looked down, couldn’t meet his gaze any longer. Up until a couple of months ago, she’d thought that was still what would be happening. Even if it was going to be a year or so later than they’d expected.

“Penny…”

She held up her hand, strength back, rippling in waves through her body. “Don’t, Daniel. Please, just don’t.”

Penny knew what he was going to say. What he was going to bring up.

“I owe it to you, Penny,” he said, voice low now. Like he was in pain. “Please.”

“You owed it to me to be faithful.” She hurled the words at him, her calmness replaced by hurt. Unable to hold it in check. Thinking of what he’d done to her and wishing upon wishing that it hadn’t happened. That everything was back to normal again.But it wasn’t. “And Ido notwant to be having this conversation right now.”

He shut his eyes. She watched him do it, wanted to do the same, but was holding so tightly on to her strength that she didn’t dare let herself.

When he opened them again and looked at her, she saw a sadness, a deepness there that she’d never seen before on his face. A hurt that she felt mirrored in her own steely gaze.

“Penny, I love you so much,” he said, leaning forward, hands on his knees. “I know you don’t believe me, but I’m so sorry for what I did. If there was anything I could do to make it up to you, any way to prove to you that it meant nothing to me, that it was the worst decision I’ve ever made in my life, I’d do it.”

Penny stood then, moved past him. Brushed fiercely past his outstretched hand, not wanting to touch him. Not having the strength to be so close to him.

Because goddamn it, it hurt.

“Trust was all we had, Daniel, and you broke that.”

She couldn’t face him because tears were streaming down her cheeks, leaving wet, slippery marks across her skin. As they curled toward her mouth she let her tongue flick out to catch the salty wetness of them.

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