Page 31 of Kiss of Light

“Lemar, I swear I wasn’t there. Whatever happened back then, it wasn’t me.”

He forced himself to think rationally. He had to be sure. He couldn’t make another terrible mistake. But if itwasher, this demonic creature trapped in his arms, then he would wage a terrible retribution.

He pressed his face deep into the well of her neck and inhaled.

Burned honey. Dark amber.

He turned her angrily so that she was on her back. She didn’t resist. Still clamping her wrists with one hand, he pushed her T-shirt up with his other. Her pushed his nose and mouth onto the skin below her breasts, breathing her in.

More honey. Sweet and welcoming.

He moved down past her waist, drawing in her aroma. She lay still, silently acquiescing to the invasion.

He went further, across the silken plane of her stomach, until he met the top of her underwear. Her scent was stronger here, overlaid with other notes. Warmer, spicier. He pressed his face between her hip bones and inhaled, letting her fragrance flood his senses.

He fought the urge to move lower. He already had his answer. It wasn’t her.

The aroma back then had been sharper, more acrid. It was similar, but it wasn’t the same. Her scent was softer. Tantalising.

The last vestiges of the dream left him.

Abruptly he released her and pushed himself to the other side of the bed.

“I was wrong,” he said gruffly. “I was confused. Everything about you confuses me, demon.”

Tala faced him.

“Tell me what happened.”

“It will repel you.”

“I told you before, I don’t judge. Tell me.”

He turned his back to her. He didn’t want to see her face when he revealed his darkest shame.

“When I was young, I decided I wanted to visit the human realm for a time. Have some fun. And so I did. I only fed from willing partners but they were never in short supply.”

“I’m sure,” Tala murmured. “And you were able to stay in control while you fed?”

“Yes. Or so I thought. One evening nearly a hundred years ago, I was escorting my latest love. A beautiful English girl who, to be honest, was a little young for me. But she was so vibrant, so alive, I couldn’t resist her. I think I might even have been a little in love with her.”

He stopped. Tala moved closer to him and touched his shoulder gently.

“What happened?”

“She offered me her neck to feed. I had fed from her before and I never took too much. I didn’t want to diminish her glow, her vitality. But this time as I started feeding, it was as if… as if I became another person. A violent feral creature.”

He drew a ragged breath.

“I couldn’t stop. I ripped her throat out and gorged on her blood. I was covered in it. And when I finally came to my senses, she was dead.”

There was a long silence.

“And when you smell me, it reminds you of that night?”

“Sometimes. A bit. But I don’t know why. I thought for a moment that maybe I had been possessed, that what I did wasn’t my fault. But I’m just grasping at straws. Vetali can’t be possessed. It was all me.” He waited for a response, and when none came he curled his lip bitterly. “Nothing to say, shaitun? Does my true nature disgust you?”

“I don’t think that was your true nature.”

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