Page 54 of Kiss of Light

He shrugged easily.

“Okay. Let’s park that. Here’s another question. Why don’t you kiss?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“On the mouth. You don’t like anyone kissing you on the mouth.”

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

“It’s not. I’m just curious. I mean, in my experience there’s nothing as wonderful as kissing a girl so thoroughly that she’s breathless. Sucking gently on her tongue and licking her bottom lip. Opening her mouth beneath mine and ….”

“Yes, yes, I get the picture.” Tala folded her arms crossly, trying not to admit his description had made her cheeks feel hot. “I just don’t like it, that’s all.”

She turned away to stare out of the window. He frowned at her profile.

“I didn’t meant to upset you. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay.”

They drove in silence for another mile. When Tala spoke again, her voice was low. As if she was speaking to herself, not him.

“In the days when I had a master, it was customary to keep shaitun in boxes. Tiny rooms hardly bigger than a cell. My master Lord Shamhurish had such a room for me. When I wasn’t required to do his bidding, he kept me chained to the wall by a collar.”

Lemar’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, but he kept silent. He sensed any interruption might make her stop. She looked out of the window and twisted her fingers together.

“Sometimes, if a servant was careless, the collar would be attached too tightly. I wouldn’t be able to turn my head. I would be pinned until someone released me.” She took a deep breath. “And now I don’t like small spaces and I can’t bear… can’t bear the feeling of someone holding my head. Not even for a kiss. It makes me feel panicked. Trapped.” She exhaled slowly, shaking out her fingers. “So there you go. A psychological aversion to kissing.”

Lemar swore viciously and the steering wheel creaked dangerously under his grip.

“You were chained in a room? That’s barbaric.”

“It wasn’t considered barbaric. Not then. Shaitun were seen as commodities. Objects. And when we weren’t needed, we were put away.”

“And this was one of the enlightened jinn, was it? The one who treated you like that?”

“It was the old way, Lemar. It’s no longer the norm.”

“But how could anyone think you are anobject? Acommodity?” He spat the words, disgusted by them. Tala shrugged.

“Shaitun have very few needs when they’re first created. They barely even eat or sleep. No-one thought it was cruel to treat us like that. Except one person, and that was the lord’s son. He came to see me every day. We’d talk and play games. He was always trying to find deeds for me to do so I could be let out.” Tala smiled at the memory. “He was a very precocious child.”

Lemar glanced at her quizzically.

“This is Shadeed, isn’t it? The one who granted you your freedom? The one you believe should be on the throne?”

“Yes,” she said fiercely. “If you met him, Lemar, if you could see the type of man he is…” She paused. “Actually, if I’m being completely honest, you’d probably hate him. He’s quite hard to like, he rarely compromises on anything, and his temper is legendary.”

“He sounds charming,” Lemar said drily.

“Oh, he can be when he wants to be. He’s got a good heart. And just recently I met his betrothed. A half-Vulcani fae.” Tala tilted her head consideringly. “I think she’s a good match for him. She looks like this fragile little thing who needs protecting, but I’m pretty sure she’s tougher than she looks.”

“You sound like you care a lot for this Shadeed.”

“I do,” she said simply. She lapsed into silence and he glanced at the clock.

“See? That last twenty minutes flew by. Let’s talk about something else. Tell me about bounty hunting. What are the worst things you’ve ever had to do?”

She laughed and launched into some animated stories. He listened with a smile on his face and a sinking heart.

Gods be damned.

---