Page 66 of When it Raynes

“Hey.” I smile at her. “Is everything okay?”

“I came to ask you the same thing.” She laughs softly, closing the door behind her and moving to sit in front of the desk. This office is something I only ever could have dreamed of before Rayne carted me into this penthouse and never let me leave. Bookshelves full of books bracket the room. The large wooden desk covered in resumes spans the center of the room, and behind me is the best view of Chicago I’ve ever seen. Lincoln Park Zoo, one of my favorite places in the world, can be seen from the desk and beyond that is the skyline that takes my breath away as the sun begins to set and the city lights sparkle.

I love this office and if everything Rayne is promising is true, which I’m not holding my breath about, then I’ll be very happy working here.

“Everything is fine.” I force the most reassuring smile I can to my lips but even I don’t think it’s convincing.

Snow sighs. “I bet it’s hard for you, this life.” She motions around us. “You grew up with so much freedom, never worried about the bad man always lurking around the corner. I don’t think Rayne has considered that as much as he should because he’s so focused on keeping you safe. The boys are older than Wynter and I. They knew a life that didn’t revolve around security guards and protocols, albeit not a very good life, but still a life. They don’t realize how stifling it can be when there’s no escape.” Snow stares into empty space as she speaks words she usually buries under the surface.

I nod. “It is hard. A few weeks ago I had a life so vastly different to this one. I was broke, and I was tired, but I was safe… or at least I thought I was. And then Rayne comes along and suddenly I’m living with a man I barely know, I have a security detail, and then I’m locked down. It’s all moved so fast and I feel like I can’t catch up.”

“What I wanted to tell you is that this part, the being locked up part, it won’t last forever. Storm and Rayne know Wynter and I don’t cope with being stuck in one place for long, and I suspect Rayne knows it’s the same for you. We just have to wait it out a little while and then once the coast is clear you can go back to a mostly normal life.”

“Mostly normal?” I ask.

Snow chuckles. “I say mostly because I can’t imagine Rayne is going to be any less protective once the Russo situation is handled. You’ll have security and he’ll want to know where you are if for no other reason than his own sanity. But for the most part, it won’t be like this.”

I smile sadly, wondering if I had known this would be the result, would I have ever entertained the idea of being with him? Would I have gone into this knowingly running headfirst into danger? Or would I have turned the other way and got as far away from him as I could manage?

It’s too late for hypotheticals now, but it doesn’t stop me wondering, what if?

36

Rayne

Having Emerson in my space puts me at ease. For as long as I can remember, I’ve lived my life on edge. Always waiting for the next blow, the next war, waiting for the penny to drop. But with her in the penthouse the moment the elevator doors close behind me all the weight is lifted from my shoulders.

I haven’t dreamed about the first life I ever took since she’s been sleeping in my arms, and that alone makes it easier to breathe. But tonight I can’t sleep. Thoughts whirl around my mind like a hurricane and no matter how hard I try, I can’t quiet them. All I can do is hold Emerson close to me, her naked body pressed against mine as I listen to her gently snores.

We haven’t made any progress with Russo since we sent Andrew and his family to Fiji, the only place he could think of that his former boss wouldn’t look for him.

Maybe I should take Emerson away. If we left the city, Russo wouldn’t be able to touch her. It’s not the first time the idea has crossed my mind. In fact, I almost packed her up and put her on the plane with Andrew and his family just so I knew she was safe, but she would resent me if I made her leave Chicago. Her life is here. The Center, her dad, school. It is all here and the moment I entertain the idea of taking that away from her is the moment I lose her.

And as much as I want to see her safe, as much as I want to keep her as far away from Angelo Russo as humanly possible, I’m a selfish bastard. I should let her go. I should have turned around and walked away the first time our eyes met, but I wanted her, and so I took her.

Carefully, I disentangle myself from Emerson and tug on a pair of sweatpants before heading to the office I’ve given to her. The look on her face the first time she saw the room was nothing short of glee and I knew from that moment it no longer belonged to me. I still work in here from time to time when she’s curled up on the couch watching a movie with my sisters, but primarily it belongs to her.

I cross to the table in the corner and pour two fingers of scotch into a glass. It isn’t often I turned to alcohol, but I need to take the edge off. The threat on Emerson and my sisters is growing by the day, and there’s only so long we can keep them here.

I take a sip of the harsh liquor and relish in the burn as it slides down my throat. Chicago at this time of night is my favorite. The streets are quieter than normal, the lights in the office buildings dim, but the skyline still glows. I can see all the corners of our kingdom, right up to downtown where it turns to Russo territory. That’s where my gaze lingers as I imagine murdering the son of a bitch who dares threaten my woman.

Footsteps in the hallway drag me from my daydream and I immediately reach for the gun that isn’t tucked in the back of my pants. It’s a habit I’ve been in since I was barely a teenager, and one I’ll never be able to break.

Emerson appears in the doorway, her nakedness covered by one of my T-shirts. The sight of her in my clothes doesn’t get old, no matter how many times I’ve seen her wandering around the house in them. “Are you okay?” She asks quietly, eyeing the glass in my hand.

I beckon her to stand with me at the window and the moment she’s close enough, I pull her into my arms. “Better now.”

She’s still half asleep, her hair slightly mussed from where she lay on the pillow, but it’s these moments she’s the most beautiful to me. Before the rest of the world can stick their nose in and make her tense, before she has ten coffees and becomes a ball of energy, before the sun can rise and bring a new day. These moments are when I get the real Emerson, and I cherish every moment she gives me. “You weren’t in bed, I was…” She trails off before she can say the word at the tip of her tongue.

“Were you worried about me, sweet girl?” I tease. It’s the first time she’s admitted it, but she’s felt it for a while. Every morning when I kiss her goodbye, she gets this look in her eye that makes me want to stay with her. The first couple of days I thought it was because I was leaving her with my sisters, and then I thought it was because she was worried about not having enough protection, but I’m only just seeing it for what it is.

Emerson is worried about me. She’s worried I’m going to get hurt because of her.

She nods and buries her face into my bare chest. She’s come in leaps and bounds since the moment I claimed her, becoming less and less resistant to the fact that this is where she belongs. By my side. If I had it my way she would already have a ring on her finger, but I’m trying to give her time to settle into her new reality, even if the idea of having not claimed her completely eats at me more and more every day. “Thank you for all you’re doing to keep me safe.”

I smile, pressing a kiss into her hair. “I will always protect you, sweet girl. You are my life, and I don’t want to imagine a version of my life without you in it, so I will go to the end of the earth to keep you safe. Thank you for trusting me to do that.”

I take another sip of my scotch, suddenly not needing the liquor like I had when I walked into the office. Emerson has calmed the storm brewing within me just by being in my arms.

---