Page 36 of Giving In

What?

I look up at him and it hits me. His traits, his stubble, his behavior, hiseverything. He’s older. Older than me. Too old to go to school with me.

“I’m....eighteen. Almost,” I say, trying to sound mature before I realize it has the opposite effect.

“And that’s cute,” he replies. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to come onto you so hard earlier. The buttons, and the chest...You must think I’m some perv now.”

I shake my head intensely. “No! No, of course not.” It hadn’t even crossed my mind that he could be older. An awkward silence falls on us and I try to pretend this revelation hasn’t affected me.

“So, uh, how come you’re moving to Stoneview?”

Silver Falls is the big city attached to Stoneview. Emily and I go when we want to go to a real mall rather than the shops on main street. Young adults usually prefer living in the big city rather than in expensive, unaffordable Stoneview.

“I have friends here I’m trying to reconnect with,” he replies calmly. His behavior has shifted and he’s clearly not hitting on me anymore.

“‘Me! Let’s go!” my mom shouts by the door.

“‘Me?” he asks.

I shrug. “That’s just how my friends and family call me. Jamie, ‘Me,” I insist on the last syllable of my name to explain.

“And your boyfriend, does he call you that too?”

Ok maybe I was wrong. Maybe he’s still hitting on me.

The warmth I’ve been feeling in my chest comes back and I smile at him. “No boyfriend in sight but I’d hope he would,” I reply.

He gives me a lopsided smile and grabs his phone from his pants pocket. He unlocks it and gives it to me. I instantly get the message and write down my number quickly.

“I’ll see you around, ‘Me,” he says taking a few steps back. He grins before turning around.

“Jamie Williams!” mom shouts from the door.

“Alright, I’m coming!”

???

Mom and I sit down at a booth in our favorite diner. It’s a rundown place in-between Stoneview and Silver Falls. It’s too cheap and old to be frequented by Stoneview’s population, and it’s just a little too out of the city for Silver Falls’ population. There are so many restaurants, fast food and cafés in Silver Falls that no one would bother coming all the way down to Silver’s. Still, this place runs on the regulars’ visits and the fact that it has the best loaded nachos in the state of Maryland, according to my professional opinion.

Iris, the 60-year-old waitress, comes over to us straight away.

“Hi, Iris,” I say in a bright smile.

“Hi doll, how have you been? Haven’t seen you two in a while.”

Mom shrugs, avoiding saying she couldn’t afford taking us out for lunch and Iris understands straight away.

“Loaded nachos and a vanilla shake for you, doll?”

I nod excitedly, I’ve been having the same thing since I was nine years old.

“What can I get you, Caroline?” she asks my mom.

“Just a black coffee thanks, Iris.”

She writes our order on her small pad and walks away. I don’t even ask mom why she isn’t ordering any food. She grew up being sent to debutante balls and forced to watch her weight despite having always been rather skinny. These sorts of things stay with you. Sometimes if she’s a bit stressed or sad, she won’t touch food for a few days.

Once I’m halfway through my nachos, mom slides her arm on the table and squeezes my hand tight.