Page 47 of Cruel Charming Psychos (Necessary Evils 2)

I shake my head. “Go wait with Nick. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

“Don’t keep us waiting,” she says, closing the door behind her.

When she’s gone, I rush to the sink and turn on the faucet. I cup my hands under the running water and collect enough of it to toss onto my face. When I hook my gaze upwards, I take a careful look at the woman I see looking back at me. I used to hate her, used to hate myself enough to carve scars into my own flesh. Some days, I still hate myself. It’s a bad habit that’s nearly impossible to break and I’m terrified I’m going to pass that legacy onto Emily.

Paige was right about one thing. Running away doesn’t solve anything. It’s a temporary solution to a permanent problem, even if the permanent problem resides only in your own head. It’s a battle that’ll never end. That’s why Nick and I have to finish this so that when I finally leave the Hamptons physically, I can leave it mentally as well. In the near future, that place and all the heartbreak will be nothing more than a memory that’s scarred into my mind.

But I’ll be free, and that’s my biggest wish for Emily too.

My stomach roars as air shifts around beneath the surface. It’s a familiar feeling. The feeling of throw up making its way upwards. I close my eyes and try to shake the feeling away, but it’s impossible. I rush to the toilet and drop down onto my knees, vomiting into the rusted toilet bowl. I flush it instantly, afraid that smelling it will make me throw up again. And then I wait as the nauseated feeling subsides and I’m left winded and tired. I stand back up and make my way back to the sink, chalking the throw up to shaken nerves. I reach into my purse to grab a travel sized bottle of mouthwash and swish it around in my mouth, reveling the way it burns at the back of my throat.

Just as I’m spitting the mouthwash out into the sink, the door is pulled open. It’s not Emily though. It’s Nick.

“Are you good?” he questions, and by the look on my face, I’m guessing he knows the answer before he asks it. “You look beautiful as always, even if you just threw up.”

I wipe my mouth with the back of my palm. His choice of words is odd, to say the least. “What are you doing, Nick?”

“I’m just coming to check up on you.” He reaches backwards and twists the lock on the door.

“And that involves locking the door?” I ask with an arched brow. “What are you doing?”

“To be honest…” He scratches the back of his head as his lips hitch into a mischievous grin. “This top-secret mission shit is making me horny as fuck.”

“I thought this was just an agreement.” I prop up my hand against his chest to stop him from advancing any further. “Why are we still pretending?”

“I’m not pretending, Addison.” He shakes his head as he begins to unbutton his shirt, revealing a little more skin one button at a time. “Maybe we hate each other. Maybe we don’t. If it makes it easier, why don’t we just call it a hate fuck?” He undoes the last button and then pushes me backwards against the side of the stall behind me. He moves forward, shifting one knee between my thighs. ‘You can’t deny that you want the same thing, to fuck away the confusion and the anxiety.”

“Are you anxious, Nick?” I question with a light laugh, trying to break the sexual tension. “They have medication for that.”

“Tell me you don’t feel it too,” he grinds out, breathing hot fire against the side of my neck.

“Feel what?” I grab him by the side of his face and hold him in place, forcing him to look me straight in the eyes. “Scared that I’m always making the wrong decisions? Scared that I’m running on empty when I need to be running with everything within me? Scared that we’re going to get away from this place and I’m going to lose my balls to return to finish what we’ve started? Yeah, all of those things scare me, and they should scare you too.”

“I’m talking about feeling this undeniable attraction between us.” He combs the hair from my face and cocks his head sideways. “Even when we swear we hate each other, it doesn’t go away.” Then, his lips hover so close to mine that I swear I can feel the sparks. “Sometimes, it feels like it’s getting stronger.”

I clear my throat. “Emily is waiting for us.”

“She can wait a minute. It’s not like this is going to take long.” He drops a hand to each of my sides and hoists me up into the air so that I’m levitating above him. His hands crawl to my ass and cup me to hold me in place as he shifts his body forward, mouthing his lips against my neck. And then he’s shifting again, his lips so close to mine and I swear he’s going to kiss me.

Like actually fucking kiss me and I swear my fucking heart skips a beat when he does.

It’s soft at first, delicate like he’s afraid I might break.

Something comes over me, something foreign. I grab him by the back of his head and sink deeper into his kiss, and then he’s feral, devouring me. His kiss threatens to swallow me whole, like a chasm of lust is tearing through the ground beneath us.

And I swear in this moment that he fucking loves me, because he can’t break away. I don’t want him to break away. I feel safe in his grasp and crave for him to have his way with me right here, right now. My mind goes to Emily, waiting in the car just like I was waiting in the car all those years ago.

I break away from his kiss and groan, “Shit.”

“What?” he questions, breathless. “Please don’t do this to me right now. Please don’t let the rest of the world ruin this. I’m so fucking horny.”

“Emily’s waiting for us.”

He sighs and then relents. “Fuck.”

I swallow a dry lump in my throat as he lowers me back onto my own feet, back onto solid ground. But even on solid ground, I’m shaky. I’ve never felt the magnetism to him, not in a romantic way, but something in the moment seems to have changed. There’s no disgust left when I look at him as he buttons up his shirt.

I feel the urge to throw up again, because fuck me sideways.

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