“I need to go,” he says softly, but there’s a hint of anger in his voice.

It ignites the combative nature in me. “Did you expect me to say yes? What would we tell our children someday?Oh yeah Kids, your father and I got engaged at the spot where we killed two men to protect your Aunt Emily?You had to have thought about this.”

“The only thing I was thinking was that I was making a big mistake listening to my heart for once and as it turns out, I was right about that. This was a mistake.”

“This is a graveyard, Nick.”

He throws both arms outwards. “We’re not normal people.”

“That doesn’t mean I want to get engaged here.”

“Fine,” he moves towards me, taking my hands in his, “let me take you somewhere else. Down to the beach by the water.”

“It’d still be a no.” I pull away from him. “I can’t do this Nick. Look at me. Look at you. We’ve been biding our time pretending that we can be anyone other than who we’ve always been. I’m not a housewife. You’re not some knight in shining armor.”

He drags his palms over his face as he lets out a stifled groan. “I’m very well aware that you don’t need someone to protect you. You’re perfectly capable of pulling the trigger or wielding the knife yourself.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

He brushes me off, gesturing with one hand as he turns to walk away from me.

“No,” I scream and rush to position myself in front of him. “You don’t get to attack me like that and then walk away. You don’t get to use my worst moments against me when you sanctioned them before, when you told me you understood why I did everything that I did.”

“Move out of my way, Addison.”

“Or what?”

“Or nothing,” he whispers. “I don’t want to do anything. I just want to get into my car and drive away so I can think without you judging me. I was stupid to come here. I was stupid to think this could work.”

I exhale softly. “You’re not stupid, Nick.”

He drops his head and looks into my eyes. “Well, I certainly feel stupid. What reaction are you looking for exactly? It’s like you’ve become so accustomed to being combative that you don’t have the decency to let me walk away.”

“Because I don’t want you to walk away.”

“Unfortunately for you, I don’t care what you want in the moment. Have a good night, Addison.”

And just like that, he’s gone. Disappearing into the dark alley situated between two buildings. I stand on the pier, alone and confused.

I could have said yes. I wanted to say yes, but I couldn’t do it here. I couldn’t say yes to a man that thought this was the perfect place to propose. That’s Nick though. Always thinking about his options and choosing the dumbest one. He didn’t give me a choice, so now I’m standing here on the edge of a snowstorm making headway above, littering the streets in an icy layer of snow. And I’m frozen in place. The thought of another glass of whiskey is enough to lure me to the right, back down the pier towards the bar I had just left. One step towards alcoholism. Two steps towards alcoholism, and then I stop in place. Cock my head over my shoulder and stare into the distant emptiness of the place Nick once stood.

And then I run, not to the bar, but away from it, screaming, “Nick, wait!” And maybe he can’t hear me, or maybe he can. Maybe he doesn’t care what I have to say, but I scream it anyways, “Yes! The answer is yes!” I run down the alleyway and slip, catching my fall with my hands. I grunt out in pain as I climb back to my feet, almost losing my footing again. There’s a pain in my knee, but I push through it, limping now as I reach the end of the alley.

I’m met with the neon glow of taillights as Nick pulls away from the curb. He’s careless as he races away, the tires losing traction on the icy roads. The car swerves, followed by brake lights. My heart skips a beat, my shoulders dropping as a weight is lifted from me. It’s short lived though. Instead of turning around, he turns left, leaving me behind as the snow shower gives way to a storm with whiteout conditions.

I retreat back down the same alley, heading back towards the pier first and most likely, the bar after.

He has forgiven me for so much, but he won’t forgive me for this. Sure, we could talk things out, but it’ll always be in the back of his mind that I said no. I destroyed his sense of pride, and I know how hard this must have been for him to even bring himself to say these words to the woman that killed his brother. He’ll go back to hating me, finding a way to blame me for the shambles his life has become. And I’ll stand in total opposition to him, standing right here as the girl that loves and adores him. Regret. Guilt. An empty life, always wanting to go back in time to change things.

And then he’s behind me again. I can feel him, feel his energy. I can see his shadow pass over the back of me. I smile. But then the shadow stretches forward, an arm. Or… something else. A hand holding a gun.

I turn to him, but it’s not him. It’s someone else. Gun locked and loaded and aimed straight at me. “You…”

She pulls the trigger, landing the shot in my chest. I stumble backwards, shock and terror, and then I fall over the railing and into the cold sea.

The last thing I think about before the world goes black is that this… This one fucking hurts.

ChapterTwenty-Nine