Page 40 of #PhiThetaForever

As the ladies start putting pies in the over, all I can do is stare at my girlfriend, watching her laugh and joke with her grandma and my mom, thankful every second that I'm getting the chance to keep her. Every moment with Lena is proof that God gave me something beautiful, unique, and unending. I need to start remembering to be thankful for it.

42 Lena

I spent the first three days home at Declan's, but I need some time to decompress from this semester. I love him and love spending time with him, but I need some time with my family. Today I'm helping my grandparents at the cafe and then spending this evening hanging out with them. We're making Christmas cookies this morning and I'm actually excited as I flour the table in the kitchen and start rolling out the sugar cookie dough. My grandma does a dinner and desert event at the local homeless shelter every year. Last year I missed it because Declan was in the hospital and I wouldn't leave his side, but this year, we're all working it with them since we'll be home.

"Your grandpa is making Little Meatball Soup for dinner with his homemade Italian bread. He wants to know if we're having anyone over to join us?" Grandma pats me on the back as she walks by and I smile at her.

"Unless you all planned to invite people, I thought it was just us." My arms already ache as I use the rolling pin to flatten the dough to the correct thickness to cut out the tree shaped cookies.

Grandma stands across from me as I set the rolling pin off to the side and sprinkle more flour on the top of the cookie dough. Handing me one of the cookie cutters, with both start stamping out Christmas trees. "You can invite Declan, honey. And Jackson and Candice, if you want. It's been too quiet around here without all you kids these last few months."

The hint of sadness in her voice makes my heart hurt. Even before I reconnected with my grandparents last year, they were used to being around Declan and the other neighborhood kids. Now, we're all in college and I never stopped to think how things would be for them when we went to school. "I'll text him after we get these cookies done and see if he has plans, okay?"

Her grin is infectious, and my answer seems to make her happy.

Maybe Declan will stay with me at my grandparents tonight, and we can have dinner and spend time with them. I just don't want to spend my entire break at his house and not have time with my own family. If he and I are going to be together all the time, we have to split the time between families.

For the next hour, Grandma and I spend time rolling out dough and cutting cookies, then placing them on baking sheets and on the rack to wait to go in the oven. By the time we're done, we have twelve dozen cookies ready for baking. Most people don't think sugar cookies are the best, but my grandmother's are the world's best sugar cookies. They soft and yummy, and she never over cooks them. Literally, perfection.

I wash my hands and pull my phone out, scrolling through my contacts until I come to Declan's name and hit the call button.

"Hey baby," he says picking up after the third ring.

"Hey. What are you up to?"

"Uh, nothing. Just shopping with Jackson and my dad." The hesitation in his voice makes my stomach drop.

"Declan . . . "

"Nothing is going on, babe. We're Christmas shopping. So don't ask what store because I can't tell you. Then you'd know what I was getting you for Christmas."

I sigh in relief. "Oh." I hate that my mind always goes to the worse thoughts now. It never used to be like that, and it bothers me.

"Did you think I was doing something wrong?" His voice is steady, but I can tell he's a little hurt.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound accusatory."

"Don't apologize. It's not like I don't understand, and don't deserve it. I promise, I'm not doing anything but shopping. My dad, Jackson and I had a very long talk this morning after you left, and believe me, I'll be lucky if my parents don't implant a tracker and alcohol testing meter into my body before we go back to school."

It's probably wrong, but I can help but laugh. "Well . . . that might not be a bad idea. Can it come with a shock feature so when you make me made I can zap you?"

"Ouch, baby. That hurts my soul," he says playfully. "If I didn't know better I'd think you like the idea of revenge."

His words bring me up short and I actually cover my mouth in shock. "Oh my—I didn't mean—I'm so sorry, that not what I meant to—"

"Baby, baby, I was kidding. Stop. You can't keep apologizing for everything. Okay? Now, what's up?"

Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes for a moment to regain my composure. "My grandparents want us to have dinner with them. I was thinking if you don't have plans, maybe you could stay the night with me at their house. Spend sometime with them. I think they missed everyone. They invited Jackson and Candice too."

"I'd love to, baby. I'll talk to Jackson. Text me what time to be there, okay?"

"Okay."

"I have to go. I love you, Lena."

I smile to myself. "I love you too."

We hang up and I turn around to tell my grandmother and jump. She's standing a few feet away, smiling ear-to-ear as she wipes her hands on a towel. "I'll tell your grandfather."