Gem: I love him already.

Bronte: I love him if you love him.

Sam: I will save my judgment until I meet him.

Gem: Where’s the fun in that?

Bronte: OMG THE DOORBELL JUST RANG WITH A DELIVERY

Bronte: OMG LANEY

4 chicksand 3 dicks

Chris: Well, well, well. Christmas came early.

Chris: And I must have been a very, very good boy.

Jason: ?

Bronte: OMG. Stop.

Chris: I got a present from Delaney.

Laney: You’re welcome. Everyone else’s should be arriving today too.

Sam: What is it? I’m at work.

Gem: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Jason: What is happening right now?

Gem: Laney bought all the girls presents.

Laney: I mean…

Laney: They’re not necessarily for single-player use only.

Chris: Yes. Ours is definitely a two-player game.

Gem: I’m opening mine right now. Are they all the same?

Laney: I tailored them to what I thought each of you would like.

Sam: Oh. Did sex toys arrive?

Jason: I’m sorry, what?

Sam: Laney went to a sex toy party. I thought she was kidding when she said she’d buy each one of us something.

Laney: You know I take gift-giving very seriously. I put a lot of thought into it.

Gem: That’s true. Thank you. I love mine.

Jason: I’m sorry, what?

Sam: Where did Bronte go? I would love to see her face.

Laney: I bet they’re trying theirs out right now.