Page 158 of What a Difference a Duke Makes

She didn’t want a husband and, even if she did, why would she want one like him? Someone as starry-eyed and filled with hope and conviction as she could never be happy with someone like him.

One night hadn’t made the darkness recede forever.

Outside on the street, Edgar lifted his face to the fine drizzle of rain that had begun while they were inside the shop.

He’d promised the children he would bring her back. He’d lied.

He couldn’t go home, couldn’t face them just yet.

He gave the coachman instructions to a house he’d never visited before.

The dowager duchess’s apartments in Mayfair.

“Banksford? To what do I owe this dubious honor?”

“Hello Mother.”

“Why are you here?”

Mari had suggested that he visit his mother in her own home. She wasn’t happy to see him, that much was obvious. “May I sit?” he asked.

His mother narrowed her eyes. “You may sit, but I will stand.”

Edgar sighed. It had been a mistake to come here. “I didn’t come to fight with you, Mother.”

“Then why come at all? After what happened at India’s antiquities exhibition I didn’t think I’d see you for another decade, or so.”

Edgar closed his eyes. “I came to apologize. You probably don’t believe that, but it’s the truth. I understand that I caused you great anguish by my actions. When I challenged Father, and then when I disappeared. I’m sorry.”

She was silent. He opened his eyes.

“Are you well?” she asked. “Because you don’t sound like my son.”

“I don’t feel like him. I’m weary of this enmity, these dark, sad memories. I want to make things right. I want to make amends.”

The dowager sank into a chair. “I never thought I’d hear you say such words.”

“I never thought I’d say them.”

“What has changed? Or, perhaps I should ask, who has changed you? Wait.” She held up her hand. “I know. It’s that Miss Perkins. I saw the way you gazed at her. You’re besotted with the governess.”

There was rancor in her voice, not gentleness. She must be thinking of the times her husband had become infatuated with their servants.

“This is different, Mother. I love her with all my heart. I mean to marry her, if she’ll have me.”

His mother’s face remained impassive. “I see. And you’ve come to seek my blessing.”

“No, I came to apologize. I realize now that I should have found a less public way to confront Father. Challenging him to a duel was reckless and wrong and cost you so much pain.”

For the very first time, his mother’s careful mask of aristocratic composure slipped away.

Was she going to cry? Edgar reached for his handkerchief and realized he’d left it with Lumley. There was no precedent for this moment.

He’d never seen his mother’s face twisted with emotion. Not even when his father had hit her.

She lifted her eyes to the ceiling, obviously fighting back tears. “I’ve had many years to think this through, Edgar. And I’ve come to the conclusion that you did what you had to do.”

“It was wrong to challenge him so publicly.”

---