Page 95 of Idle

“C’mon. What are best friends for?” He forces me into a bro hug, which I try not to reciprocate.

After finishing my Guinness, I make my way back to my apartment. My lifeless, empty apartment.

For a moment, I allow myself to picture Paige in here, making all sorts of design changes. Then I shut it down. Nothing good can come from this. I crawl into bed and let sleep take me away.

I spend the next day whittling a bunch of nonsensical mythological figurines. On Monday, I go to the bank and sit in my new office, studiously ignoring the drawer with Paige’s business plan. Instead, I make comments on SlideShare decks. Work on pivot tables. Have several Zoom calls with people all over the globe. Not a chief compliance officer yet, but on my way.

Where’s the creativity? The life? The excitement?

At home Monday night, I pull out the piece of wood I’ve been whittling and focus on it. Spend time on the eyes and the curve of the neck. The peace I’ve been missing sinceNYC Viewswrapped blankets me. My soul needs this.I need it.

The next day, Tuesday, I go to work thinking things will be better. Conference calls lead to additional tasks to complete. More responsibilities. None of which excite me as much as my whittling project did last night. During lunch, I succumb to temptation and open the drawer with Paige’s business plan. In St. Patrick’s Basilica, I sit and read it. I almost fall out of the pew when I see she included a monthly donation to MADD.

At six, I show up at the restaurant my parents insisted on taking me to for the delayed celebration of my promotion. Homer rambles on and on about how much power an executive director has and how to wield it effectively. As I listen to him, Paige’s business plan counterbalances his words. Needing to shut her down once and for all, I do a reckless thing and pull it out of my backpack.

“What do you have there, honey?”

I glance at Marge before settling my focus on Homer. Clearing my throat, I begin, “I had this business plan presented to me last week.”

Homer’s eyes grow wide and I swear he grows in stature. “You’re already having clients come to you? Amazing.”

I flip through the pages and open it to where she’s discussing how our fantasy business would work. Homer will take one look at this and tell me it’s a foolish pipe dream. I hold my breath. On a rush, I explain, “It’s actually a business plan for Paige Hansen—my partner on the Renovation TV show—and me to start our own carpentry and home flipping business.”

Time stands still.

No one moves.

Marge finds her voice first. “Excuse me? It’s what?”

“A business plan for Paige and I to go into business making furniture and renovating houses.”

“Why on earth would you do something like this when your career is ahead of schedule?” Homer’s fist pounds the table.

“Maybe because he likes working with his hands and creating beautiful pieces out of wood, like he did onNYC Views.” Marge’s response floors me.She watched the show?

With a growl, Homer snatches the business plan from my hands and flips through it. I steel for the derision I’m sure is coming. He points to one of Paige’s tables. “Are these numbers for real?”

“I’ve reviewed them. They are.”

“Holy shit. Who knew there was this much money to be made with this stuff?” He keeps flipping the pages.

Who are these people? Marge defended me and Homer’s not outright snorting with laughter. It’s her next questions that nearly put me on the floor. “You never talk about women with us. Did you fall for Paige? She’s a beautiful girl. When can we meet her?”

“We’re not together.” Anymore.

“I can tell from your expression that you want to be, honey.”

“I can’t,” I exclaim. “I can’t put pleasure ahead of career.” I turn and stare at my father. “That’s what you always taught me, Homer. I’m not set in my career, so how can I get together with Paige?”

A confused look crosses his face. “Wait. You’re not set in your career? But you were just promoted.”

I throw my hands in the air. At least Homer doesn’t disappoint.

Marge’s hand lands on top of his. “I think what our son’s trying to say is that his career doesn’t lie in banking, but rather with construction and carpentry. He’s very talented.” She places her other hand on mine. “I also think you have to grab onto love whenever you find it. If Paige is your girl, don’t let a ridiculous saying stop you from getting her. I scolded your father for parroting it.” Her head turns toward Homer. “Don’t forget, you were working in retail when we got married.”

Retail?

In a voice barely above a whisper, he says, “I only told him that to make sure he would focus on his coursework.” Homer clears his throat. “Jesse, if these figures are as accurate as you believe them to be, you’d be a fool to pass up this opportunity. You won’t be making this sort of money in banking for a long time.” He turns more pages. “Plus, you’re going to have to apply your business degree to this Arch Pointe Furniture contract.”

---